Gift of Ty's 7th Birthday

No flowers  

   But so much joy

       Loves to laugh
           But not into toys


               Always so loving
                   A special little boy


                                         Stands a        part
                                             Steals your heart

                                                      His name   it's Ty
                                                      I know he can fly
                                                           No way his autism will hold him 
                                                                                                                down
                                                           Ty will always stand his ground


            He is wanting more
                                        and seeks and tries opening doors
                                                   
      
          Our God watches him from above
          And me, just grandma, wants to always  
                                                              s
                                                               h
                                                                 o
                                                                   w
                                                                      e
                                                                        r
                                                                         him with my love. 
Click for YouTube Video

God's greatest gifts are the mysteries in life that we seek to understand and that grow learning from, in the process. 

                                                         
                           

Can We Change the Future for Autistic Adults?

Most research on autism is performed on children.  The key areas where intervention occurs with children are in behavioral and educational functioning.  In these focused therapies, with children, there is undoubtedly marked improvement over time.   During adolescence or adulthood, mental health issues, such as anxiety and depression can worsen, even while the other issues of autism can become much more improved. Their needs will continue even if their other needs lessen. In some cases, those needs from childhood continue, dependent on their level of functioning.  Many autistic adults will need assistance regardless of the progress they make. 

It is so apparent that there is not much focus on the aging population of autism in our communities, support legally and legislatively for autistic adults, as there is for children.  Frequently, especially with those in the under-served low-income families, there is no support system in place. Even in the middle to upper class families, parents may die without having concrete plans in place because society doesn't have much to offer. The autistic adult can't function as well, if at all, in our world.   They are now dependent on others for aid that will not care to the extent their parents did. Consequently, they are at the mercy of a society that seems to not care as there is no real system in place. In a country where everyone's rights are supposed to be protected, their needs will not be met. Don't we still have a moral obligation to see that this occurs?

Making services available is ethically our responsibility as a civilized society for individuals that can’t provide for themselves. Everyone in our country is entitled to quality of life and this class of people should not be excluded. If you talk to parents and families of children with autism, this is by far one of their greatest worries, what happens to my child when they grow up, when we are gone? 

Some individuals with autism are unable to communicate well and many can’t communicate at all, especially when under stress and anxiety.  Assessment of their needs be it health, mental,  financial, living arrangements, basic care and feeding, should be assessed and  addressed routinely.  If employment can be provided for high functioning adults, this should be coordinated or assistance should be offered so they are contributing to their own well-being, as self-sufficient as possible.

One viable solution is to form Autism planning groups known as APG. Having read about this concept, it seems to be one of the best proactive ideas to date.  These would be committees comprised of concerned individuals from all areas of the community, including healthcare providers, business representatives, religious leaders,general population people, educators,  etc,  to formulate solutions, concrete development schedules, sites and financial backing.    

The purpose of the APGs again, would be to address the growing population of autistic adults’ future health and social needs. By starting the process of beginning training programs for care workers including volunteers for diagnosed, autistic adults of varying functioning levels to thrive at their level, the plan would be in place. Facilities could be built for living arrangements, job training programs could be established with connections to businesses willing to help, and  all the various factors and variables addressed.  The cost of a program in place would actually be far less than the current cost of having no system in place, especially when taken into account the huge growing number of autistic individuals in our country. 

Programs in place to address our growing population of autistic adults within communities would mainstream their needs  and make it  more of a seamless transition.  This will decrease stress to both the individuals, the families and the care providers. Furthermore, solutions will lessen the financial and emotional burden to communities.  It may also provide jobs, not just for the high-functioning autistic adults but those working in these types of programs.   Ultimately the end goal will be met, to provide and give this segment of the population the quality of life they deserve.

Consider that 3.5 Million Americans live with some degree of the autism spectrum currently according to the Autism Society Organization.   According to Advancing Future of Adults with Autism, the anticipation of an incredibly large population of autistic adults is increasingly being called  the "autism Tsunami" .  The economic cost of not having a working system in place is staggering dollar figures. In 2002, it was estimated to be  $126 Billion annually - it tripled by 2006.  And we live in a nation with an increasing debt continually facing cutbacks. This issue has to be addressed and quickly. 

If you are kidding yourself thinking you do not have a personal stake in this issue, caring for autistic adults in the future, because you do not have an autistic child, grandchild, niece, nephew, neighbor, you are wrong. We will all pay for these needs. And every challenge has a fix.  

Delivery of training, assessment, specialists to provide services, housing, drop-in advice, job placement assistance, is possible. It needs focus groups devoted to creating solutions. Consider lending your hand and pushing for your leaders to put this topic on their agenda this year. Quit eluding the autism Tsunami.” Solutions are needed and we must be proactive and not retroactive. Funding and focus is needed. The time is now or your conscious may be at stake.  Yes all lives do matter! Speak loudly, even louder, for those that cannot. 

Johnny Dean's Story

Dean McIntosch, Personal Statement, Adult w/Autism, UK

Happy Birthday Grandson Ty!

As more and more children get diagnosed with autism, the field opens up to continued

hypothesizes of what causes it and the best ways to treat it. These include the practical to the outrageous.  I am astounded by the reactions of the public, in particular by those untouched by the diagnoses directly. And I must admit, frankly I was in that class as of 4 years ago. That was until the advent of my darling grandson Ty Ryan’s diagnosis in 2011.  Now, as he celebrates tomorrow his sixth birthday, May 29^th, we honor not only his birth but his advances with his therapy.

Herein lies a boy whose parents were told he would never speak. And yet, one day I will never forget, his mother proudly called me to tell me she had placed him in his car seat. As she was driving down the road and dodging traffic, she clearly heard him say Mommy, not once but twice. 

This is a boy, who though autistic children are often times incredibly difficult if not impossible to potty train at a reasonable age, has been trained at an appropriate age.

Most autistic children will not make eye contact with strangers. Ty will most definitely do this and in addition to smiling says hello when prompted.

The list goes on and on of accomplishments of this astounding little boy.  I think it is due to parents that are steadfast in their devotion to pushing him the extra mile, getting him the best therapists and also getting great therapy. And I also believe he is gifted. 

The last but the single most important element in this soon to be six year old’s life is the presence of God.  He is surrounded, at all times by Christians, friends that believe in the power of prayer.  They believe in prayers for him, his family and for praying for continued progress on his journey.  His milestones show that the prayers and faith are working.  Also we all know that due diligence and positivity matter.

As a grandmother of one of these very special chosen children of God, please no longer ask me what is wrong with my grandson.  Refrain from asking me if my children did something to provoke this condition I  find this question offensive actually.  God makes things in life happen for a reason. I did nothing to provoke cancer and they did nothing to create the condition of autism. Let us celebrate his life! 

Do not look at my grandson with anything but joy.  Do not reflect on him sadly. He enjoys his life and so should you. Children pick up on others perceptions of them. It is wrong to label him anything but a child.

 If you see me, my children or anyone else struggling to control a smaller child, do not stare, nor be judgmental.  Kindly look away.   You are not always aware of the child’s condition, what the parameters are. 

I recall being at the Zoo Easter Hunt in line to enter the event and my grandson was upset. Everyone in the line was staring at him. This does nothing to aid the situation, not for him or any child for that matter.  What is the purpose of staring?  It simply embarrasses the child and he is receptive to feelings also. Please don’t embarrass autistic children; they have feelings just like everyone else. Give them their privacy when they are uncomfortable. 

I am in awe of the progress Ty has made and of all the hurdles he has climbed. It feels like he is continuing to defy the odds set before him.  Please continue to pray that better forms of therapy will arise and more research dollars are funded to continue the effort for this special population. May the next 6 years of young Ty’s life be even better than the first 6! 

Love,

Your proud beaming Grandma

Birthday Video for Ty Click here to View

Autism Changes Like the Seasons

 Fall is somewhat like spring in the north.  Forget about sweatshirts down here; you can still wear flip flops outside. Heck, in the south folks wear them year round, right through the dead of winter.  And on Sunday, the end of September was one of our typical beautiful days that make me fall in love all over again with middle Tennessee.

Last year we spent a wonderful day at Lucky Ladds Farm with the grandkids and their parents in Eaglesville, TN just south of Nashville.  Just when I thought it couldn’t possibly get any better, this year it was just fantastic! One more year of intense therapy for my two autistic grandsons, Jake and Ty Ry and the changes are unbelievable. I am not sure, sometimes they are even recognized as being ‘special needs’, especially our youngest one Jake. 

I smiled with pride as I stood back and watched them both on the Farm.  I snapped away with the camera every chance I got.  My friends, the Lameys say I am like a foreign tourist with my picture taking! With these kids, I want to show the world what a happy family looks like with autism in their life.  My son’s family refuses to let a diagnosis stop them from living life to the fullest.  

As we entered the farm, surrounded by a sea of pumpkins and people, my two grandsons walked on their own this year, no longer shy or having reservations about going someplace new  There were no meltdowns, no heads bent, nothing of the kind. They were as excited as every other kid in line waiting to begin their wild Sunday adventure.  Jake was taking it all in, saying a few words and sentences, at the age of three, much like some of his peers.  Ty was giggling and laughing, just like the happy boy he usually always is; he adapts now so much easier to change.  

Lucky Ladd Farm is stock full of things to see and do. There are farm animals fenced in to feed, a petting area, slides, corn maze, rides and other things beyond this.  Ava, the big sis, in one year’s time has dramatically improved her language skills.  Now she is keeping pass with her kindergarten class that we weren’t so sure she would be in last year.  She easily expresses herself, in no uncertain terms, like every other five or six year old emotional little girl. 

Oh, we stand back and try hard not to laugh, as her parents find ways to lay down the law to their strong willed daughter without breaking her spirit.  But, as grandparents, we cave in. “You want a horsey ride? Here is $5.00, pick out a horse to ride honey, and go for it! ” What are grandparents for? 

Last year, Ty was completely afraid of the animals.  His mom reminded me of this the other night.    This year, our courageous little grandson was amazing, a changed little boy. He was fascinated by all of the animals and could not take his eyes off of them.  He was engaging, feeding them and allowing his

daddy to hold him close so he could get clear access to their mouths and feed them from his hands.  Grandpa and I stood watching, forgetting most of the time to snap pictures.  We were in total disbelief. Where was our little frightened grandson? 

Gone are the two little boys who hated being near others.   This day, thanks to their parents and the therapists’ hard work, these kids mixed and mingled with everyone.  Whatever they wanted to do, climb or see, no one was going to stand in their way.  Anything they saw they wanted to do, they went for it. No tears, no fits, no whining. Even the highest slide was not off limits to these boys.  Each boy went down first with their daddy, my son, gently assuring them they were completely safe and could do it alone.  Next time, he sent them down alone asking them to help him count to three, and down they went!  Not a peep from either of them except as soon as they hit the bottom of the hill, round they ran to climb back up the hill for more.

There was a huge shelter area that had corn kernels in it.  Supposedly autistic children are funny about things on their hands, or people in their space.  Ah, Jake was in that area, front and center, dumping the bulldozer, filling the dump trucks and as far as being around the perimeter of the huge area, no he was not having that.  Even with all the children in there, he was determined to be dead center, and that is where he remained the entire time until I had to drag him out.   And I do mean physically pick him up to remove him because yelling his name did no good. He would ignore us and then respond occasionally with a “No Grandma” because I was not mommy or daddy so he knew he could get away with it!   

It was time for Jake to move out of the pit, so to speak and see more of the farm.  Slide time was now and his mother had instructed me his melt down recovery time had lessened and that he was not to always have his way. I braced myself. His fits in the past have been long and pretty loud and inconsolable. Well, Jake told me no loudly and started whimpering.  I promptly said yes to him, and walked in the middle of the corn pit, swiped him up in my arms, and told him we were going to the slide with mommy and daddy.  Those little feet and legs began kicking.  As soon as I said stop it, they did!  Wow, therapy really does work!  Shocked I put him down and off we went to the slide, with a smiling little guy with no tears to show any discontentment. 

Ty, once notorious for meltdowns, is now the calm little boy his daddy once was years ago.  When he breaks down in frustration, from being overstimulated or overly tired, he calms down quickly for the most part.  I have been instructed what to do and found out Sunday, it works right on cue.  On the top of the slide, I could tell he was getting ready to have a meltdown. When I tried to settle him down, he seemed more agitated with me. I could sense what was coming so did exactly what my son and daughter-in-law have told me to do in the past. I picked him up snugly and when he began kicking, swinging his head, and continued yelling,  I simply confined him up against my body tightly and walked him out away from everyone in a nice quiet area.  I put him down and he was immediately fine!  He literally looked up at me and smiled!  We walked over towards the swings and all was well with the world.   No more long extended meltdown.  What a big boy; I could not be prouder!

Standing out on the acres of Lucky Land Farm that was covered in gorgeous landscaped flowers and haystacks with scarecrows, it looked like a children’s and adult’s playground.  Gone were the worries of the world.  Also, gone were the labels that the world puts on children.    Those silly labels mean nothing; they are judgmental statements that need not apply. 

Please take a few moments and watch the video.  I made one last year also with my blog of the same trip.   It was to show the normalcy that exists in a family that, on the outside looking in, many people think is so different.  I also get asked a great deal how my grandsons are doing. This is an easy to way to let folks catch a glimpse of two very special boys and the loving family that is just as important to us as they are my two grandsons. Without the other three, those two would never thrive. 

This family, Mike, Rebekah, Ava, Ty and Jake have gone through tremendous growth this year. Major progress has been made in therapy. Ty who use to use some sign language, as he was told he would never speak, is defying the doctors. He is speaking some words now.    Hopefully, the images on the video reflect some of the changes in the boys.  Autism in the family requires this, continued work and continued growth.  It is a slow steady progress, with steps backwards, at times,  but more steps forward when things are going right.    It is a constant ever changing journey.

One of things I have learned from my family is that I can never totally comprehend what it is like, on a daily basis, to have autistic children in the home. The best I can do is try, try to understand.  If we all do that, as a family, as friends, as a church community and as a society, it helps. 

Recognize too, my kids never complain. They love their children and would not change a thing about any of them.  We would not, as grandparents, want to change anything either, not one hair on these darling children’s heads.  Our grandchildren are as God planned, like all children are. 

Many children do not have parents who can care and give them the alternative therapies these kids need.  We simply ask that others have compassion and pay attention to the legislation and the changes that need to be made to help these children, their families and the adults with autism to assimilate progressively to the world.  They deserve it.  Having proper therapy to be the best they can be and reach their full potential is imperative as a larger population is going to become an even greater segment of our adult demographics of the future. 

These children and their families deserve to feel like they do when it is a beautiful day in the fall and they are at a pumpkin farm.   Just like the video below conveys. At the end of the day, that is what they are.

                  

                                       CLICK HERE TO VIEW VIDEO

                              

Ty Advances at Four

Not every day is a good day for Ty, it can’t be. It isn’t for any of us. But his life has rolled out different than just about anyone I have ever known.  He came into this world like so many other little boys, naked and screaming.

I can still remember standing at the nursery window with my son and his uncles, my daughter-in-law’s brothers, one being his middle name, Ryan.  As we watched at the window, moments after his birth, his chest was caving in and out as he yelled.  We  could see his rib cage expanding with each scream. We knew the newest member of our family was going to be a strong contributor who would make his presence known.   Little did we know, at the time, he would be so silent.

I had never known anyone autistic. My children were both fairly normal. I guess a better term for them is children with no special needs. I still can’t say I know how it feels to be a parent to a special needs child, only to being a grandmother to one.  I am a strong supporter to my children, and am now very cognizant of this topic and very supportive of the cause. I wish had been more in tune sooner. I waited till it was a reality for our family and only then became informed.  I took the same road with cancer.

 I think we are all like that somewhat.  Only when we are directly touched do we step up to the issues that seem insurmountable and take them on headfirst.  Sad though that we tend to wait to get involved when our involvement, confronting issues, helps things change.  We need to be more proactive as a society and as Christians.

Ty has only been around for four short years.  In that time frame, he has shown me that

every day that goes by there are signs of hope.  His growth, over the years, astounds me. He has gone from being a reclusive boy who never smiled to what you will see in the video. He is coming out of his shell. He is learning to interact with the world and with people.  He is a reminder that people can change, minds can be touched even when it involves neurology that we don’t completely understand. Given enough energy, love, repetition and support, battles can be won and Ty is winning them.

I still don’t understand why him. Why my grandson had to be chosen to have autism.  I no longer question God over this and no longer pray for it to go away overnight. I believe he will continue to fight his way over the hurdles. I know God has Ty in his sight, has a plan and Ty is living it.  We are part of that plan, all of us, his family and perhaps all of you, reading and watching this. I wonder what part you play?  He is one small boy but God created him to have an impact.   Little by little he is making strides towards some imaginary finish line to continue a race and continue making advances.

As Ty hit his four year old birthday, we all were amazed looking back at last year’s birthday to see the growth and development from the last 365 days. No longer is he a boy who flees to his own bedroom when company comes over.  He now will interact more with the world than before, is hitting a growth spurt and continues on the learning curve.  

I recently heard my dear Rebekah question herself, “I wonder sometimes in my zest to have him be the best he can be if I push my son into too much therapy.”  I told her, “You are only guilty of loving your son as much as you can possibly can. Amen God gave Ty to you!”

Click for Video for Year in Review for Ty

The Gift of an Autistic Adult Son

It was a long Saturday night at work.  I needed a break and headed over to the coffee stand to get a chai tea.  As I waited for my drink, a woman caught my eye. She was sitting nearby on a bench with her arm around a young man. He was good looking, appeared very shy and had headphones on. Something about him struck me as very different, for starters, he kept his hand downward and seemed to smile a great deal, something I seldom see young people his age do.  

His mother, I presumed, had her arm over his shoulder was lightly rubbing his shoulders with her hands and occasionally bending over whispering something in his ears.   As I glanced over and caught her eye, we exchanged smiles.  Once I got my drink, I went over and asked her about the headphones as they looked quite different to me, larger than normal I thought. It was then she told me that they were a special pair, to reduce sound because her son is autistic and has issues with auditory stimulation. Too much noise over stimulates him so they put those on when in public to cut the noise level down to decrease the incidence of outbursts.  

I told her I had young grandchildren that were autistic and found them to be extremely loving children. She began to tell me the story of her son.  He was her second child. She had been a kindergarten teacher when he was born four years after his brother.   He seemed to be behind early on but she assumed he would catch on and catch up eventually. Once he started in school, he was considered more of a problem child as he was given to fits and being somewhat violent out of frustration and diagnosed with autism at that point. He was removed from public schools as she quickly learned they were not the best equipped, in her opinion, to deal with her son’s needs.   She quit her job and devoted much of her time to getting him into special therapy and classes for autistic children.  

He is now 22 years old, operates at about the age of a three year old and is the one of the biggest joys of their family’s lives.   He is extremely affectionate and asks for nothing in return.   He speaks but is limited in his vocabulary.  The most important thing to a mother and father he can say though, communicate his basic needs.    

He has his  odd idiosyncrasies but that is what helps make him special and unique. For example, he enjoys picking up trash so while we were talking, off he went in a circle picking up some trash some loiters had left on the carpet around us.   His mother watched him all the while with a smile on her face and said she has learned to find his little tasks like this endearing.  There is no use in telling him that the cleanup crews will clean up the pieces of paper he is picking off the carpet.  He derives so much happiness in doing so that to interrupt him would only cause him anxiety and sadness.   If they don’t watch him at home, he enjoys talking all of the toilet paper off of the rolls and the paper towel rolls as well!  These types of things are part of the humor and joy of living with autism.

He cannot tie his shoes but he can wave at people when they address him, and at times, he does. His mother said she was not sure how he would react to me but I could try to say hello to him.   He kept looking my way and smiling so I slowly looked at him and made eye contact a few times. Then I knelt down being careful not to get too close and lightly put my hand on his back right by his mother’s hand, smiled and said hello.  He stared down at the floor, smiled real big and said hello back.  For an autistic person, this is wonderful, this is a welcome, and I was so pleased he accepted me. I told him it was a pleasure to meet him and meant it!  That exchange meant my day,  he was just a sweet young man.

His mother’s story did not end with her son.   This Thanksgiving season has more in store for her family. As she sat there on that bench, so peaceful and full of joy, beneath the surface, she is praying reverently for a miracle.  

I hope those of you reading this will too.  You see, as she sat there, hanging on to her son closely, as if the two of them were the only two people in the world, her world could get quite a bit smaller indeed.

Her husband and her only other son, 26 years old has both been diagnosed with Stage 4 colon cancer. She went on to elaborate and tell me the prognosis is not good and everyone at the church is praying for some sort of miracle. She knows in her heart they will be healed.  However, she is not sure it will be done on earth, as it is looking more likely it will be healing in heaven.  She is accepting God’s plan with the grace she accepted her autistic son twenty two years ago.  They were only at the mall today because both men were having a good day and wanted to get out.  She sat there telling me that she was so grateful that she had her son because one day he may be all she has and she would need him as much as he needs her. 

I told her I would share her story.  Thus, I am.   I believe her faith is beautiful and shows the light of God.   I believe that is partially why her son’s smile is so bright.   I told her of my young grandsons and she offered words of wisdom.  I hope you, that are reading this, will find the time to reach out to this stranger in prayer.  

There is no way I could hear this story and not reflect on my two grandsons, Ty and Jake.  Her son was so good looking and really looked like any other twenty two year old. For some reason, I sensed he was autistic but yet there was nothing about him to clue me into it directly. The woman told me that once you have been around autism you seem to have a keener sense of those that possibly have it than others do.   I believe I met her for a reason.   She was truly inspirational and she loved hearing about our family’s Jake and Ty. 

I also believe, if you think of this woman’s story this Thanksgiving, you will realize you too have a lot to be thankful for and to be smiling about. The image of her, the loving mother,  on that bench with her devoted innocent son sitting next to her wanting nothing but his mother’s unconditional love was precious.  In a world full of unsatisfied wants and needs that seem to be endless, it is refreshing to see quiet acceptance and embracing of what some see as a difficult situation.  Who would imagine  themselves in this situation and sitting anywhere happy and at peace?

May we stop for a moment in our tracks and reflect on what we truly do have. May we rejoice in those gifts.  And last, but certainly not least, bless you for what you bring to God’s kingdom, your uniqueness and the light you shine.  May it continue to shine on earth till our true King calls you home.  

Updated video on Ty Ryan & Jake James Glasmeier Below :

Captured Innocence

When I was a child, I am not sure if taking photographs was frowned on, considered vain, poor etiquette or just not done like it is these days.   In any event, I can say there are relatively few pictures in existence of me when I was under the age of five or six.  Unfortunately, the ones beyond that age should be used to start a big bonfire.  To say I was a goofy looking child would be putting it mildly.   Maybe that was my goal, to make folks laugh.   I think Ugly Betty and I would have been best friends.   And my fashion sense, well that is another topic all in itself!

Maybe, for that reason, I have always gone slightly overboard on taking photographs of my own two children. I wanted to be sure they always had images of their younger years.  I felt it would be interesting to look back, when they had babies, to see if there was a resemblance.  Those old baby books I kept, with the infant and preschool photos inside are priceless, to my adult children and to me.  Now that they have children, I find about the only thing they care to look at in the book are the photos. They could care less what their first word was, their first solid food, etc.   

I was one of those mothers who dragged the kids and the husband to Olan Mills Studio for all three pictures sittings when offered this deal over the phone.  You remember the deal?  That is, after the 5^th call to my house and three weeks of no sleeping at night, they finally wore me down and I said yes.  When I got to the studio and saw my baby’s pictures,  I broke down and bought the entire package.  How could I possibly say no when it was such an adorable picture of him smiling? Never mind that he probably just passed gas, in my mind, he was a happy baby full of joy.   

Oh and the next photo shoot, this sitting was the screaming photo. I am guessing this is a standard for all new moms.  This one his face almost matched the cute red corduroy pants his grandmother bought him for Christmas.  Even his bald little head was red.  She was going to be so touched I used them in these pictures.  This one he was not cooperative at all, I suppose colic kicked in. I really am not sure the lady believed me because all she seemed eager to do was get me and my son out of her studio and on our way.  That is, until we came back in to view the pictures, then she thought he was precious, even with his mouth wide home and tears streaming down his face.  I valued those pictures, at the time.  

By the time I was done with Olan Mills Photo Studio, all 3 sittings for their “fantastic deal” for new moms, my expense that year was equivalent to a house payment.  Good-bye Olan Mills Photo Studio, hello K-Mart special deal in the middle of the Blue Light special by the ironing boards.  Ironic too that a few years later, I found pictures lying around in a box.  I realized these were extras of those old Olan Mills picture days. Wow, what was I thinking; especially that second one. The only thing cute in the photo was the red pants!  I did the right thing, I burned them!   

When my grand-kids came long, my passion did not lessen any towards taking pictures. It only intensified. Facebook hasn't helped any either.  My adult children are very good-natured about it now. Much more accommodating than when they were the subjects of my photographs.

However, my grand-kids are quickly learning to pick up their parents’  attitude towards

Grandma’s camera. I am seeing a pattern begin with the older two.  Often, one of them will either start to run for cover or turn up a lower lip making a naughty shot that says pouting is what you are getting on film.  Or Ava, my only grand-daughter, is fond of simply turning her head down so I have a nice shot of the top of her head.  At least her mom puts pretty bows up there so I have a shot of a gorgeous bow for her in years to come.   Lately, though, I have found if I keep clicking my camera away, laughing all the while, eventually she will look up. And then, I get the perfect picture of her smile! Boy, what we Grandmas have to do to get a good picture.  Delete ten bad ones to get one good one. 

This year, prior to the  Autism Walk in Nashville, I asked my friend, Carole Robinson, reporter/photographer for the Williamson Herald for a favor.  She agreed to take photographs for me at this event of the kids. It is hard to be interactive with the children and, at the same time, be a shutter bug with the camera catching them in action. And the action shots are always my favorite, I hate the posed shots.  I wanted someone to be able to capture the special moments for me so that I could just be there, loving my grand-kids and be a part of their special day.

The Saturday the event was held was a perfect setting for pictures because it was made for children like my grandsons. Both boys are autistic, one is two and one is three.  Ty and Jake were two of the stars, our heroes.  And the field was wide open giving the kids full rein to run around and be free, something both boys so enjoy doing at will.   It was a beautiful sight  to see them in their wide eyed innocence, happy and laughing.   My niece, expecting her first born child child, watched with a twinkle in her eye wondering if her upcoming baby might one day be just as boundless in energy.


Our walking team was there to also show our support for the boys best supporters of all, their immediate family.   Every day my son, my daughter-in-law and their big sister Ava live with autism, the work and challenges that go into life with autism, never complaining, never questioning, just loving and accepting the challenges and moving forward.   They are the face of an American family dealing with a life altering diagnosis that is forever changing the landscape of their life.  In reality, it is affecting all of our communities, it is just some citizens have their heads turned downward,  like Ava occasionally does.  Eventually, just like I tell Ava, everyone in the communities will have to lift their heads up, look around and see....it is there.  You can't keep your head down forever. 

Captured images speak louder than words.  Perhaps this is where the blog should end and the video should begin…..    (click on the link below)   

Where's Jake?

                                                        ***VIDEO LINK***                                             

Ty Three Ribbons

Another year has gone by ,

time to write about Ty Ry.

His birthday is approaching soon,

the living room will be filled with balloons.

This year he may be in the room,

or he may opt to be a little cocoon.

It is not that he is rude,

it just depends on his mood.

Sometimes he hates all the noise,

Unlike so many other boys.

Ty finds joy in simple things,

Like listening to other people sing,

Things that give him joy,

Are not wrapped up like toys.

They are gifts from the heart,

This sets him apart.

His needs are many,

His wants are few.

When he tries to lead you by the hand,

Don’t ignore his lead,

His hand is his way to plead,
"Walk with me, help me grow, 
       I have seeds to sow.
           You may find that  I am a key
                 In another way God wants you to see
                         What a wonderful world this can be!"

Another year has gone by and my grandson’s birthday is approaching. It seems only fitting that I would write, once more, about our special Ty Ryan Glasmeier.  This is not simply about an adorable little boy with autism.  It is about a million of children he represents with the same diagnosis. His story is probably not that much different. But yet, since it is my grandson, it feels much more personal and unique to me, he seems more special.  What grandmother doesn’t have a bias towards her grandchildren?   

Often times, as I watch Ty play or run to me with his smile on his face this year, I can’t believe that a grandma can love a little boy as intensely inside as I love him sometimes.  That is something new this year, a greeting with a smile.  For a long time, smiles did not grace his face.  He now kisses often those he is near when asked to do so.  It is a wonderful big step in our lives, and his. He has become so affectionate, thanks to his parents working diligently with him on accepting touching.

 Funny how your heart can love a child  and yet hurt at the same exact time.  I watch him and want so much for him and yet, my mind tells me  grandmothers that have autistic children feel the exact same way about their special grandchildren as I do. They know, with increased funding, research and therapy for these children, the sky is the limit.  They pray, as I do, for advancement and miracles. They want others to understand and to care also.  Autism is a hard thing to understand when you have no direct exposure to a child with it or an adult, especially when many can’t  speak or express what they feel or go through day in and day out.  Those of us that have an inkling, as none of us truly know, must try to make a voice, and put a face to autism. Ty has a face, he is the face of autism.

Last night, a new American Idol was crowned.  I read his life was forever changed. Our lives were forever changed with Ty’s birth and subsequent diagnosis.  The young man who won the coveted award, Philip Phillips, for American Idol gets a tremendous amount of money and a recording contract. Meanwhile, my son and daughter-in-law  get  to take their son to therapy sessions.  The joy they experience is much different than sitting at a recording studio. Phillip hears great playbacks but my kids greatest joy is when the therapist comes running out and tells them of a great stride Ty made in therapy in any given day! Then a phone call comes later in the day to tell Grandma the latest new step in his development so we can all celebrate another victory.   

The money frivolously given on reality television shows  gets spent  on promoting themselves.  My children’s goal is to come up with over $15,000 one day to buy Ty a service dog.  Right now, some of the best coveted therapies are not covered by insurance policies.  This limits the doors open Ty, the days he can spend in a special type of therapy that benefits him the most. But we treasure the  windows of opportunities that are presented to him just the same. Ty has taught us all more about life than anyone we have ever known; small steps matter,  joining hands for a common good is Christianity at its best.

For many years, I detested celebrities that took on social and political issues. I must say, with the influx of bullying going on, my attitude has forever changed. This issue has become epidemic and too many children are dying and suffering daily. My daughter in law forwarded to me that horrendous story making the news this year of the child bullied for being autistic. Our hearts were heavy with the mere thought of someone so vulnerable being made fun of by someone trusted and respected.  We all thought of not only Ty in the future but every one of the million autistic child and adults in our society.  Vulnerable people are already at a disadvantage.   Society tolerating this type of behavior is unfathomable, for anyone. Whether you are a Lady Gaga fan or not, how can you not respect a celebrity who puts all of her efforts behind promoting and embracing this issue.  She is driven towards making a difference and denouncing bullying and admitting she too was bullied throughout her life.  Our differences are blessings not curses. This is true of autism also.  We can learn from those that are different, that is why we are different.

While the whole world listened to news of Whitney Houston’s death, it was in close proximity to my daughter in law having a tear filled moment of her own. After a exceptional productive therapy session Ty had with his therapist , my daughter-in-law was told her Ty had uttered five words out of the blue. This is the same little boy who was never supposed to speak.   He may never say them again but for that day, he had, out of the blue, spoken.    Her heart sang.  As she drove home, cars around were riveted to news about Houston dying.  I imagine some drivers were teary eyed like her.  But her silent tears flowing from her face were from gazing at her darling little boy in the car seat from the back view mirror as she beamed with pride at the joy of learning he was uttering audible words.  Her Ty Ry continues to surprise her.  His love has no boundaries of his mommy as he stares back at her, oblivious of why she is crying  but he senses she loves him intently.   Ah, what a wonderful world we live in!

Political debates are continually being played on television. Healthcare issues are always front and center.  My son works in the healthcare field as a independent family dentist.   The debates are  heated on these healthcare issues, and affect small business owners such as my son.   My son could be paying more attention to this on a Saturday. But here he is,  out in a soccer field with his son Ty at an Easter egg hunt. Ty is unnerved by crowds so to help him stay calm but still participate and not miss the moment, his dad is with him.   Dad and son walk, hand in hand.  He lets his young son walk him, where ever and whichever direction Ty would like to go. Not a care in the world, this proud father lets his small but determined two year old son lead him at will.  Very few eggs or candy get picked up and that seems to matter little to the father, only that his son is smiling and they are together.   

See, autistic children don’t always like to be led and if forced to be led, at times, they can throw a fit.  The debaters on TV could learn from my son,  something about compromise.  Sometimes it is not about who is right but about learning that sometimes it is better to follow and get something done than being the leader and spending all your time fighting.   Pick your battles wisely.  Then you can focus on getting things done.  And thus, make the world more harmonious. 

The news focuses daily on gossip, scandal and celebrities.    We have our business news, our sports heroes and our updates on stock trades.   Our family has our news too, of Ty regularly. It consists of the good therapy days, mastery of a new skill set that has been worked on for quite some time, a new program Ty is eligible for, an additional sign language symbol he is using, and behavioral changes.   And we too have our hero, it is that same small fellow, a little boy who is never far from our thoughts and prayers.  He is representative of so many others in society. 

 Our hero  doesn’t really change from day to day. It remains the same little person. He just gets a little bit bigger, a little brighter over time and continues to amaze us, teach us about life and  about ourselves. He is oblivious to the effect he has on us .  Ty Ry doesn’t even ask for any recognition. Ty Ry doesn’t want to be the center of attention, he will avoid it.   I understand, by nature, autistic children and adults don’t want to be.  We all need to respect that BUT they need support. Their families and their therapists need our support.   Not enough is being done in this area.  Take note, please.  The numbers are staggering.  Ty is only one of many.   I pray Ty is a vessel for that to happen, a catalyst for change.

Happy Birthday Ty;  you make the world more beautiful!

Ty Is a Renegade Making a Difference!

Dear Readers,

An adorable baby boy was born May 29th, 2009. He was welcomed into the world by his mommy, daddy and big sister. This child was unique in a way that many young children are finding themselves likewise. As he grew, his parents sensed something wasn’t right, that their little boy did not seem to be progressing normally through development. They sought out early intervention putting him into therapy where he was quickly recognized as suffering with Sensory Integration Disorder. When he turned two years old, his parents had Ty tested. Their suspicions were confirmed; they were given the heart wrenching news; Ty Ry was autistic.

Since that day, they have embraced the diagnosis, educated all of us and surged forward with determination! They wanted early intervention for Ty Ryan even before the diagnosis. Now they are even more determined that their son will become more engaged in the world he lives in. They want their son, Ty to be a Renegade for Autism. Whatever troubles his mind, his small world, there will be help to overcome it and make it bigger. He is destined to make a stand for others, like him, letting the world know autism has a name, autism has a heart and a soul, and a face. Autism is a reality in homes by millions of families and we must listen. We must care and help these children and these families in our communities to make a better future. You see, simply said, what they want for Ty is what so many families that have children with autism want for their children also, simply what they deserve, a chance for a budding future.

Every 15 minutes a family is told, “Your child is autistic.” The numbers are staggering of families affected by this. Many times, autism is not recognized till much later than Ty, making it much more difficult to treat. Ty’s mother, Rebekah, intends on letting Ty's story be told over and over again in the hopes that some mother will recognize her child's symptoms early on. We must do all that we can to improve the quality of life for these children and get them into treatment quickly and keep them there as long as they need it; it is our social responsibility.

There is no TYme like the present to make a change. Please consider collecting and giving your change for a cause that improves the life of an autistic child. Please give your TYme for children like TY. He can't say thank you YET but those of us that love him are praying, given enough therapy, one day he will be able to!

Blessings to you and your loved ones, Grandma Ronni

INFORMATION FOR THE WALK IN NASHVILLE, TN

Walk Now For Autism Speaks

For Details and to Register for our (Ty's) team or donate to it,
please visit the link below and search on Team Name: Ty Ry's Renegade

Visit:
http://www.walknowforautismspeaks.org/faf/home/default.asp?ievent=463129


NOTE: I wrote a blog on 1/11/11 on Ty Ry Glasmeier. If you glance back and read it now, perhaps you will see, between the lines, even back then, our family had a sense that he indeed was a special little boy. He is our angel and we feel blessed God placed him in our family. Thank you for reading this entry. He warms all of our hearts immensely! Amen.