Oh My God, Visitors!!!

I keep waiting for Tessie to slow down, become less exuberant when someone new comes to the door. She is two, how much longer must I wait???

The average day: We wake up to a beautiful day with our wonderful loving pet/child wagging her tail.  Thus begins a new day and she is content, stretching and yawning much as a person rolling out of bed as she steps out of her kennel/crate. 

As the morning progresses, sweet Tess curls up in the lanai on a lazy boy

 chair to take in the outside noises as the windows are propped open, perhaps just for her? She sits silently for hours watching the grass blow and has become an avid Bird Watcher!  Occasionally she will step inside to see what is amiss in the house, with her mom and pops. 

There is that occasional switch to another window in the house for an alternative view of the world.  Notably the front window is a great resting place, where golf carts drive by in full view.

Lo and behold, someone comes to the door…..the world is on edge, Tessie’s world that is!  All hell breaks loose as her bark begins in earnest to announce “Intruders are present and accounted for!”  Even after being assured all is well with us, she continues to breathe heavy, pace and becomes a beast lurching at the door with her front paws.

At these times, a small 10 lb. mutt seems like a slice of heaven compared to a 55 lb. ball of hairy muscle and confusion frantically trying to save the world! Tessie the beast is arisen. Our once gentle passive docile pet is so high-strung it affects both us and our visitors for a moment. 

As we are yelling “Place” her command to return to her safe zone, that being a raised mat she has been trained to go on, we somewhat laugh.  We are not supposed to be giving commands in raised voices but above the thrashing of her body we cannot be heard talking in a normal tone.  Tessie places then pops off. We give the command, then back she goes,,, then off she comes. Usually after two times, Tess is there to stay until given a command to come off.

When our precious ball of fur is released, we go through Round Two. The humor comes into play when we try to explain she is normally very calm-natured.  I believe company brings out the hellion in her and we see a far different side of Tessie than the one out in the lanai that ignores us most of the day. 

So, as she ages, the question remains, will this lovable pup soon learn that visitors are not intruders?  Is Tessie going to back off her demands for attention from every single person that graces her with a visit to her ‘dog cave’? Will she learn that people do not like tongues that have licked other parts of her body on them? And lastly, what is the time-frame that Tessie will quit acting like a dog?

Doodling on a Labradoodle

The most frustrating part about owning a labradoodle is the grooming if you do it yourself!  Whew, their hair grows fast and unlike other breeds, it is like humans and keeps growing so must be cut every 4 to 6 weeks.  The hair gnats up easily and it doesn’t help that they are a dog so run around, roll, and scratch causing even more pile ups in their hair! To groom a doodle is anything but oodles of fun!

I have tried almost all products known to man to make my life, and hers, easier as I do the grooming myself. This list includes human detangler sprays which I find do little more than put a nice odor on the top of her coat for about 15 minutes max. Spraying it means I am how detangling wet hair as opposed to dry hair and thereby pulling out even more hair than if it is in its natural state.

The grooming becomes a challenge between Tessie and me. Her patience starts off excellent and then falls sub-par 2/3s

Tessie 

through. At that point, I am the enemy and she makes my pampering experience for her intolerable by moving constantly, pawing me, turning this way and that, trying to escape or the dreaded “kissing me.” This is not advisable when I have sharp scissors or a trimmer in my hands! She thinks it will aid in ending the whole process.

Brushing regularly is a must with this breed. Every few days it should be done, minimum of once a week a very thorough brush out. Remember, the more frequent you groom, the less rustration. Our vet recommends daily!

When you complete grooming, outwardly your dog looks no different to the viewing eye. You will be the only one that will know they were detangled, brushed and sometimes even trimmed! With hair that has a mind of its own, even after being groomed, they may appear no different. Labradoodles always look fluffed up and somewhat messy. And as soon as your pup scratches, there is potentially another knot up in their fur!

Well, if I had another labradoodle and had to maintain it like her, I would simply say “Shoot me now, less painful!”  All this work to ensure she is well maintained and to save money.  But wow, increased blood pressure with the stress.  I am always shocked when someone comments on her grooming because I am so far from an expert that it is funny anyone thinks she looks great when she is my Guinea pig for trimming. I literally watched YouTube videos to try to devise a strategy!

Nowhere does it mention on the videos hair gnats clog up your trimmer! Nor does it mention a wiggly dog while you are trying to get angled cuts that look professionally done around the ears.  Oh they are quite a bit of help but so much is learned through trial and error. Note:  There are no pictures to be found of the errors. I try to forget them. When she comes out beautifully, I try to not look shocked and say “All in a day’s work.” In reality, it feels more like luck is involved to some extent.

I love this breed, labradoodles, but, I hate the grooming. I think it’s important to take the time to tell 'would-be owners' either invest in a great groomer or do it regularly yourself, preparing yourself not to be pampered or pampering your pup.  The spa day treatment is a misnomer! It is hard work. What you will end up with is a dog that has the look “Who wouldn’t love me?!” 

A Mess? Bark Yes!

Each day begins with me hearing a four legged friend next to me making noises in the morning.  It looked like a puppy that popped in the cage at night to get her milk bone but

what I see now is a contortionist! The sounds are that of the cage as she repositions herself moving her four legs in the oddest twisted positions, never looking remotely like the images of dogs seen curled up like a bug in a rug. Even outside the cage, she does this. Thus, my day begins with the sound of the cell rattling as if Tess is imprisoned. She seems the only one in the bedroom unbothered by the noise, as she rattles it with her four paws.

When I realize, after about 15 minutes into the rattling each morning, Tessie is into her stretchy phase of the morning festivities, I prepare myself to get up. She looks no different than her sleeping state in her cage now really, except her face is more into the contortions she does with her legs; she seemly meekly looks over and quickly it becomes a much more intense stare.. What is it about a dog staring at you that burns through you as if someone is continually poking you until you respond?  The power of a stare, wow, even pets have it innately! And we apparently are trained by them to respond.

Tess has grown over the last 18 months of her life into a slim but nice size labradoodle for me. After having a 125 lb. lab, a 55 lb. dog is sure a treat!  However, the pull on the lead can feel as strong as the smaller the dog, she seems to be able to get more traction at times. This is especially true when her two favorite things to go after are in sight, bunnies or geckos.  My husband and I try everything to get her distracted and if that won’t work, the commands start coming right and left before the dreaded “No Tessie” has to be stated, repeatedly. To date, no deaths!

It seems the minute I step out the door with her, someone is coming by in a golf cart. She is well-trained to sit when cars and carts go by. However, if someone wants to stop to see her, or as she feels, admire her, all bets are off. Then it begins a match between her wants and mine. She wants to levy out kisses and jump which is not allowed. We paid too much for training to have a disobedient dog. Too bad Tess doesn’t always subscribe to that line of thinking. She will push the limits when new people are near her, so eager to give out love. She desperately wants everyone to like her also. Perhaps she has self-esteem issues because she is kinda ugly. Oh shoot, her vet says the poodle part of her is very sensitive to comments about her looks and that I must tell her she is very pretty, regularly. I must say I am lax in that department. Who wants a dog with a big head?  

I kind of get Tessie, in a strange way. Her appearance is confusing making her probably a very confused individual who needs a lot of reassurance. She is a labradoodle but her DNA got crisscrossed and she is just plain unusual looking like God couldn’t make up which color to make her. Thus, she is like no other I’ve or many have seen.

Tessie’s mother was a chocolate brown and her father was a black poodle, Tessie is neither of these colors. What I see looking up at me is a continual changing mish-mash of white,

gray and shades of both, a variegated whatever is the best way to describe her, kind-of like the Muppet   from Sesame Street. Her tail is the exception, clearly black, been that way from day one and stayed that way.  Perhaps it was the one way of letting us know she was going to be just like her dad named Buddy, a gregarious large doggie, full of personality!  Tess’s hair is a mess   so more often than not I say “Tess, you are a mess” because when she is brushed, well she looks no different.

Speaking of different, when Tessie boards with her trainer, she is so good they can use her as a demonstration dog. Yep, the same dog I am talking about issues on the lead with jumping (and in the house with company, sometimes, as in totally unpredictable) they have a well-oiled machine!) They hand her back to us saying, if you have a problem, you are the problem.

Actually, in most all ways, we are good with her too. And she is a good dog. Issues many other pet owners have we don’t and we thank Tessie regularly when we hear of them.  No accidents, no destroying things in our house, no horrible separation anxiety or not obeying

house rules we have established e.g. certain furniture she can’t sit on. We even leave her in the house extended periods of time out of the cage all the time and come home to nothing out of place. The extent of her damage is eating paper out of the garbage. What is it about the taste of paper with her?  And she bugs me for feeding her my watermelon and yogurt. But I started the bad trend by feeding it to her in the first place. Wednesday night has become $1.00 ice cream cone night for not just us but cone night for Tess; she lucks out because I don’t like the cones! Technically, those are bad habits I suppose but every dog must have some bad vices. 

Tessie can be your best friend when you just want someone to snuggle with and other times, she prefers her space and prefers being left alone. Then, I have to entice her with a treat to even come up and sit with me on the bed.  There is one chair in the living room she has been trained she can sit on laps. She will literally fly through the air across the room to jump on the lap to plop on!  No warming just flying mass of a blur of silver, gray, off white and there is Tess in your lap. In a split decision, she’ll decide if your face or ears are dirty, and it will be hell to pay to get her to stop!

And yet, when she is done with the licking, with me, she curls up in my arms, and lays her head down. I feel I have a precious gift, and feel blessed. Many times, she literally falls asleep like this, in my arms, like a small dog. I hate to get up to disturb her. I want the moment to last awhile just like I felt when my kids had early morning feedings as newborns.  Except, it feels like a dead weight, but I bear it because it’s her, it’s Tessie and at the end of the day, I love her, mess and all!  She’s a mess but, hey, so am I so are we all. And yep, I love you Messy Tessie

Puppy Furr-stration

I said I would never get a dog again. And then I did. I had a lab and said I would never get a lab again. Mine could never be replaced. So I got a lab mix, a labradoodle. Charley, I said was the worst dog ever. Then came Tessie. I was wrong about Charley. And so the story goes.

I see many blogs in my future about Tess, the mess. She is a girl or I would rename her the Tramp from Lady and the Tramp because not only is her color close to his but her hair looks similar, messy  and, if she had a voice, that smart ass personality would be present also.   Heck, I swear she even rolls her eyes at me when she gets exasperated  like when my kids were teens and I was giving the safe sex talk and told them the best way to avoid it is just don’t do it! Maybe Tessie senses I think she is a hussy and we are having a female power struggle in our house.

And speaking of power struggle, I thought the humans were supposed to be in control? I just told her today, I miss Charley. That is my lovely lab that was so devoted to me. You know her response, yea I bet you do. The dog that seldom barks barked at me as if to say, “Tough beans, you are stuck with me, suck it up!”  Instead of being my girl, it is like that song Jessie’s girl and I am Tessie’s girl! She thinks she is the master over me.  Is it too late, at 7 months, to take her back? I looked at her today and found two can play that game then and I barked back at her and she ran for cover!

Speaking of cover, my escape route is the shower, peace!  We have one of those wonderful large walk in showers with a super cool shower head with it that puts out a mist like you are standing in the rain.  Apparently the only time Tess likes the rain is inside, in that damn shower.  And I like my showers alone, at least not with the smell of a wet dog if you get my drift. 

Today, as I am preparing for my shower, I neglected to close the shower doors completely, leaving one up a smidgeon.  As I walk back into the bathroom, standing in where I should have been in just a few moments is Tessie, breathing in the nice warm steam.  I stand outside the door realizing she had, once again, taken her head and bumped the door open and now had her face was upwards soaking up the mist like she was Queen of the House. Daddy was gone and so Tessie’s girl could simply wait till she was done.

Oh hell no is what I said audibly!  And with that, she hustled to the back of the shower out of reach. So we played that game for a few moments until she made

a mad dash out of the shower before I could catch her. By now, being full soaked smelling like a wet dog, she made a b-line for my bed. Then, to compound my frustration, she quickly rolled on the bedspread to dry off before I could grab a towel. Oh, to have Charley back and have a puppy that cared about being in the good graces of mommy!

For some reason, the bathroom is a pitfall for Tessie. The garbage man comes two times a week but in our bathroom it is cleaned out daily.  Our darn trash can is motion activated and Tess has learned how to use her snout to pop the lid, bury her head down deep and seize the contents and tear out of there with them firmly in her grip.  This pup loves eating tissue and paper! I am seriously thinking about writing the manufacturer Ninestars and suggest they put on their label Motion Activated by Hand or Dog Snout.

We always have one particular paper in our house, our community newsletter. Perhaps partially because I write at least one article in it a month, I have to read it. Yes, there is some vanity there.  This month Tessie heard me read it aloud and hated the piece. She ripped it to shreds; get this, not the entire newsletter, just the page my article appeared on.  I am calling her now tear-er instead of terror! 

She has been trained. But I apparently haven’t been. We are both taking refreshers later this month. In the meantime I thought the Dog Whisper might

be a good thing to watch till our lessons. Anyways, Tessie loves watching television in the bedroom at night from the bed where she can see it well. So I taped several episodes. These shows, it is pretty easy to tell it is a dog show by the noises of the dogs on the show.  However, it seems to be the only show Tess is not in the least interested in. I think, honestly, it is because she realizes the dogs are not the master. She is much smarter than the Dog Whisperer. He really needs to come to her house. Note, I said her house, not mine!

About the time I think the breeder needs to take her back and someone offers to take her because they think she is so darn cute, she hops on my lap trying to make up to me.  There is something in me that suckers up to her when she lays her head on my chest and plants those little kisses on me.  I do love how when we play hide and seek, she can always find me and just seems so overjoyed at the sight of me and makes me feel so loved and appreciated. And then her tail wags and I know the bond we have has continued to grow. And I can’t help myself and realize the puppy I brought home is staying here till the day she grows her wings.

But I won’t stop poking fun at her till the day she stops doing it to me!

Tessie Tests Us

As I sit here, wetter than the dog, I wonder why I didn’t jump in and lather up with doggie wash. Or

is it called doggie shampoo since she is hairy all over?  Man, can my dog splash in the tub! And I thought the grandkids were like whales in the shallow end of the pool in the bathtub, Tessie has them beat by a mile!  Puppy adventures are extraordinary and so easily forgotten or nobody would ever get one again!

I looked at puppy, wet down, minus her labradoodle curls and she was a skinny runt with long legs, barely recognizable. I had to admit, she was comical. I thought about taking a picture but stopped myself knowing it would be downright embarrassing to her for others to see looking so goofy.  How pitiful does Tess look wet!  Quickly I got her out of there, well actually twice she half jumped out and I not very politely shoved her head and shoulders back in there.

Next was the trip to the bathroom with the cool air from the blow dryer to aid with drying her. Never

having been graced with curly hair, whew, what a surprise was that. Earlier today I did my first mini trim job on her, taking off just a bit of her hair. That bit I cut off must have been enough to make it spring back into action. Blow drying it after the bath, her hair was like a slinky being put up for the day!  Bouncing but not behaving!  She was a sea of poodle curls and not loving the air coming at her. Her mouth was wide open showing me her new teeth coming in as she tried to bite air. Oh great, I am sure to be treated to gas later tonight, compliments of Tessie!

Due to what the trainer calls’ “counter-serving” Tessie is now going away to Camp. Maybe we should call it school for the delinquent or strong willed child.  We called who our vet recommended “Sit Means Sit.”  And then they found out she knows the command sit but her sit is short-lived, like most everything because her attention span lasts about .yeah, that long, a period at the end of a sentence.

Counter serving, by the way, is the dog that has incredibly long legs and can reach up to the top of the counter. Tessie likes to see what is going on there that has my attention. Also, it is imperative she find out if there is anything available to steal, chew or just look at.  If she doesn’t see anything of interest in front of her, she just moves along down the counter with her feet on the ground and her paws sliding down the counter.  Yeah, others think it is cute, funny or whatever. To us, it is aggravating and to the trainers, it is a definite no-no, right up there with the jumping on everyone.

So after spending some time with our little gem, the trainer and I were in agreement, a simple few training lessons is never going to be enough for Miss High-Energy Low on Attention Span Puppy

especially given her breed. Heck, this great trainer had a horrendous time getting even eye contact with Tessie. I think Tess sensed she was going to make her mind and thought, “the hell with this lady.”  So, Tessie will be boarding with them for 10 days and come back a changed lady instead of the Tramp. Get it, from the Disney move…..

She gets walked daily by the driving range. Lucky for her, several golfers in our community are bad hitters and balls land way off the range on the walking paths. Those balls get spotted by Tessie and thus dog walks consistently include a game of chase the ball. This is great fun and wears her little butt out so it has an added bonus.  It is hysterical to watch her overrun the ball, try to apply her brakes which are her legs too long currently for her body.  She lands up splattered on the ground like a deer on ice!  She looks up with you with her raccoon mask like “What the hell just happened?”

I have to say a real shocker is how much Tessie loves car rides. Never have I had a dog that enjoyed the car. With her, there is no drama, no panting, crying, barking or pacing. She simply sits in the back seat and occasionally looks out to see who is out there and possibly if any good looking dogs are tailing us. 

I still have bite marks, as soon as some heal, new ones form. Oh yes, she gets reprimanded, toys given to distract her but in time, that doesn’t work either. This puppy is high energy and smart.  She is learning right along with us, what works and what doesn’t.  And then there are the times, though rare, when she is the sweetest loving thing in the world.   But all in all, I think we’ll keep her! 

Testy Tessie

And so it goes, my luck with dogs, I get the puppy that is one of the largest in the litter, untold till I

bring her home. Two days later, I get a text from the owners letting me know my test to see if female

Tess & me

dogs are really more gentle-natured is really more of a lively Brut compared to her 6 brothers in the litter of 7. Thus, begins the life with Tessie, testing my patience.

Okay, I admit I forgot the trials and tribulations of potty-training. My kids were much easier and so were ALL other dogs I owned. This little bitch is a challenge. She is smart being a labradoodle the poodle seems to be quite dominate making her extremely intelligent.  Thus her norm is outside is playtime, inside is peetime. And thank God the vet suggested giving her treats as a reward for going to the bathroom outdoors. However now she seems to think going anywhere is worthy of a treat. Who is smarter, her or me? 

Everything in the house is a play toy, except the doggie items I bought in the rip-off section of the store! You know the section, where the sign says Pet Toys and are simply kids toys made small with baby squeezers in them the size of your thumb but inflated prices by 75%.  Today, Tess discovered toilet paper. So glad I buy it bulk at Sams because it is going to have to still remain in reach of the john inspite of her penchant for unrolling it. Oh, don’t tell me our puppy is not talented. She can unroll it in a mere 30 seconds flat!

So Busted!
Better than doggie toys! 

Do you know what it is like to take a shower with a small puppy with long legs at your feet?  I do.  The only time Tessie does not mind being in the water is when I am taking a shower. The very minute I hop in the shower to take the quickest showers in my life she begins whimpering like she has been attacked by another dog, right there in the bathroom!  As she cries by the glass doors, scratching “Mommy I want in” I relent and let her in.

Thus begins my, what use to be, chill serene showers, long gone, now invaded by a four legged animal weaving figure-eights around my feet. Once she gets done feeling as if she is tangled and me being cautious of not losing my balance, she does the unthinkable at my feet. I blink and there comes the squat. I watch as she proudly does #1 and thank God it is not #2. And nope, no treat this time for Tessie.

Tessie now wants out. She has her bladder unloaded and has had enough! Out goes the wet mangled puppy looking like a black rat. All I see is too beady eyes looking back at me silently saying dry me

off. I look back with mine saying Hell no, I am not getting out right now when I have a moment’s peace and the shower finally is to myself. You can wait, you black rat!  She retreats to the rug to wait patiently knowing sometimes I win the battle.

After showers, I dry her off.  I then head to the backdoor to grab her leash to take her out. Good routine, because it’s all about catching the time for #2. I want that number always done in its proper place, I mean this dog will be a lady! One day, as I am putting the leash on, struggling to find the darn loop, she starts tooting. Okay, I tell her, I am hurrying. Her squirming is not making it any easier. Whodathought more would come with the toot?  Isn't she a female?  

Right there on the floor, thank God not the carpet, she starts dumping a load! I am shocked beyond belief, I am holding her and she starts her business. For the love of God, what puppy does this?  I swear she is simply being defiant to me. I make a mad dash out the door as if she has anymore left in her little butt!  By the time I put her down in the grass, she is hopping all over the place, literally giddy with laughter at what she left me to clean up inside.  Don't dare make excuses for her because she is cute or a puppy, she does this shit on purpose to punish me for being a disciplinary in the house.  We played outside longer than usual so I could put off cleaning up dirty diapers, I mean poopy floors! 

The Spoiler, Daddy! 

As my friends tell me, puppies need routine, they need structure. And just like with my kids, I am the one that does it. And just like with my children, she rebels. She does to her daddy, Mr. Softie.  Can we just say, with puppies rebelling  and everyone telling you she is so sweet you are left speechless?  Why do people so easily forget what little teeth feel like buried in your feet and how many chords lay on the floor? 

Well, in all seriousness, she is a bundle of life, with its ups, downs, full of laughter, frustration and happiness and love. She fills a void in my life that my dog Charley left and still is there. I love her already  inspite of her testing me, at times to the limit. And truth be told, if she could talk, she would say I test her!

It's Been A Year Charley

What do I miss most about Charley since it has been one year today since he has been gone?  

This is a toss-up since there are so many things I use to write about. He is the dog that everyone seemed to fall in love with, even those that never met him! At the end of the day, I would have to say the crazy way he had of making every day begin and end with laughter and love!

From the moment we picked up Charley he was commotion in motion!  I followed the breeder down to where he was at with the puppies in the litter all scurrying around a baby pool. Naturally the one I was taking home was literally climbing up everyone’s back as she is telling me “He is such a sweetie!”  I am thinking “He looks like a royal mess, a little bear who needs obedience training for toddlers.”

As she tried to give us all the information, he kept running away, another trait we became all too

familiar with over time. Charley was the escape artist as the neighborhood was well aware of.

Luckily all of them loved him, the big galoot. That is, except for the foul-mouthed man in the back-end of the subdivision who had lots of guns who threatened to shoot him if he ever laid another paw in his yard,  He even pounded on our door one night at 10:30 to tell us he thought Charley had been up there earlier that night while he was gone. We have no idea how when we were home all night and avoided his place like the plague!  I think, by then, Charley didn't even want to pee in his yard! I think he just hated labs or me because nobody hated Charley!  Maybe I should have let Charley get close enough to lick his face when he was outside our front door screaming. But maybe not, maybe that would have been the one time in Charley's life he'd have acted like a guard dog! God knows, at no other time did he!

Charley started the day like a little kid, bugging us to get up. If it was just me home, he literally bumped my head. If I ignored him, he jumped on the bed, and began pulling the covers off of me. Next he pulled the pillow out from under my head. Then became the face washing. Anyone that knew the size of Charley’s head, more precisely his tongue, knows you can’t stand this for any length of time!  Morning has broken, Charley style!

Taking a walk was more fun with Charley on a leash. You couldn’t help but notice every critter that moved by, even fly by leaves or plastic bags that appeared, to him, to be potential prey.  He had enough of the hunting field dog in him to want to impress us. But we had to keep it real and tell him he wasn’t all that smart and was lucky we adopted him because living on leaves and roadkill wasn’t nearly as luxurious as what we were feeding him.

One of the highlights of every summer day was watching him swim in our pool. I have seen dogs jump off a landings into pools. Charley flew!  It was incredible but not a picture of grace.  And if you didn’t want to get wet, you couldn’t be standing anywhere on the deck! We threw Frisbees and he would catch it in his mouth, he could carry it back, he could retrieve it under water. Charley was halftime entertainment for neighbors. 

Charley would swim with us and play with my granddaughter in the pool. What a joy to have a big 125 lb. moving toy in the pool who just loved being there and was interactive!  If we tried to keep him out, he sat at the window or at the patio doors barking his head off like there were burglars outside.

Speaking off security, Jim always said he was a poor excuse for protection for our home!  Jim could walk in at lunchtime or at the end of the day and find Charley sprawled out on our bed.  He walks in to where he found Charley and asks him accusingly “What if I was a burglar Charley, would you just lay there and do nothing?”  Thank God we never had to find out! I think the answer is that as long as they weren’t going for his treats, they were okay to come in to his house!

Having a dog everyone talks about because he is like a big Marmaduke is really hard to replace and get over losing. But the stories I have are endless and so many friends that knew him and of him keep our special Charley as much alive in many ways as he was for 13 years.  He was so loyal to me that during my chemotherapy, I am not sure anyone was with me as much as him next to Jim. He never left my side no matter where I was at, even hanging by the bathroom door if I was sick, whining if he heard me till I was well and back in bed or in another room and okay.

I miss him horribly but knowing, at the end, he was suffering I am so relieved he was out of pain. He deserved to be free again, at peace, in heaven running and jumping and harassing all the other dogs up there before him.  I know that I won’t have to look for him when I get up there. All I will have to do is say his name and he will come running and I need to remember to not lock my knees…..  Some things about Charley won’t change, not even in heaven!   My loveable angel Charley, love and miss you! Momma

Savor Your Loves

Wistful week, reflective moments. While sitting outside with Charley last night, a neighbor walked by with her little dog. She wanted to greet him and he began barking his head off. As she pulled back on the lead, backing off from him in fear, her doggie lurched forward fearless of the dog outweighing him by well over 90 lbs.  Thus began our conversation and the fears we face in life.

Maria was her name. Her husband was diagnosed with dementia 5 years ago. It was not that gut wrenching to her and the family at first as she had lived a rich full life with him and thought it would be a slow long progression downhill. She was fully committed to taking care of him herself, as so many are.  Over the years, the dementia progressed and went somewhere over the line into Alzheimer’s and many thought she was nuts for taking care of him herself.

Maria had baby gates put up so he would not leave the house in the middle of the night. Living in a gated community surrounded by concerned neighbors helped.  She slept on one side of a barricade to keep a constant vigil on him the last two years incase he awakened and needed her. Those years were full of late night walks when he felt he was called to duty by the police force and needed to patrol the streets again.  When driving her car, to him everyone looked like a potential criminal and should be arrested. She would have to have him sit on his hands so he would not grab the steering wheel and pull over to make an arrest like he had for some 30+ years on the police force.  

The day finally came, when diapers, speech and body functions were making it impossible to care for her beloved husband any longer so she was forced to put him in an assisted living center. Within days, he suffered 3 strokes, and within 2 weeks he was dead. She said, perhaps the way he wanted it. He preferred being at home with her. So now, he is waiting in heaven for her return, this time to greet her with his faculties all back in check.

Bob died May 17^th, 18 days ago. Here we were, standing in the street, just beyond my driveway, talking at the sun was going down as if it was any other day. And yet, the conversation was heavy in some ways. I listened as she shared. When she learned I have a great deal of experience being around folks dying of cancer, she asked me questions. We discussed these together as it is more important she come to her own conclusions than mine.

Amazing how, in one conversation, you both can get a renewed faith in God, yourself and human resilience from others you barely know.  Bonds are formed that quickly, by a human connection. We can change each other’s life that quickly and leave an indelible mark on each other in life.  And life is short-lived.  Life is a cycle and there is no denying part of life is dying. And then returning home.

Today, I was in a melancholy mood. As we sat waiting for the vet to see our dog, a man pulled out front with his car, right outside the front door. He came around to the passenger side and gently lifted his dog, a golden retriever mix out of the front seat gently laying her, on her front legs on the pavement. Someone opened the door and he picked his dog back up placing it inside and holding her.

Everyone watched and yet did not watch. The room was silent, the dog was silent, the man was motionless, his face was expressionless yet it was clear what was to come. The dog was in bad shape. No one said a word, not any of the dogs, or the office staff. We all sat there praying he was called back first, praying our dog wouldn’t ever be in that spot and yet knowing surely they all would, one day.

He was called back, and just as gently lifted his dog up and went into the room. You could have heard a pin drop. When he left, the door slowly opened. I caught a glimpse of his beloved pet lying on the soft blanket the vet had laying on a cushion to help make the floor softer. How thoughtful for the last bed the doggie would lay on. I couldn’t bear to give the doggie but a glance because I wanted to think in my mind of that gorgeous dog, jumping, barking, licking kids’ faces and such, as dogs are meant to do. 

The man’s eyes caught mine, just for a split second, and then we both looked away from each other. He had been crying. He quickly wiped away a tear. And walked out of there ever so quickly, back to his car and then just sat there. I know a piece of his heart was breaking just as Maria was at the loss of her husband. 

The cycle of life is hard to comprehend at times but teaches all of us about the mysteries of faith. Why it is important to savor the times we have with loved ones and not take them for granted. He started up his car and pulled away. He will start a new chapter.  Maria said to me she is redoing parts of her house as she must rebuild her life, alone. We are given another day to live. Until we aren’t, embrace your life and those you love, fully and completely. 

Pins and Needles: Acupuncture for the Lab

What?  Charley has to have acupuncture!  A 99 lb. fur ball of energy that barks non-stop in the vet’s office! Is this vet out of her mind?  Apparently, not because it was scheduled this week and we showed up. 

It went something like this:

 I walk in this week with my canine as eager as ever to greet everyone in the waiting room area with his usual cheery self.  Cheery, in Charley’s case is tag waving so hard it is knocking everything over that is on table tops because he is so abnormally large for a lab. He is so big folks ask us, even though he looks and is a pure bred lab, “What the hell is he?”  Let me not forget that it is usually him pulling and leading me on the lead instead of the other way around though I do my share of grunting as the trainer taught me. My grunts are hard to hear over his exuberant barks!

The vet comes in, pretty quickly actually. I think she was as anxious as us to get this show on the road. This was not going to be an easy feat but she assured me it would go smooth. I noted she avoided eye contact, with me that but not the dog.  Maybe she thought she was the ‘doggie whisperer’ and could somehow spellbind Charley into being something he is not, quiet and passive.

She had a pad lying on the floor for him with a cute Christmas blanket on it, so nice and comfy. He wanted nothing to do with it. I tried to explain Christmas was right around the corner and Santa was watching, get your doggie butt down but Charley was biting.  He continued his panting, pacing, licking her face, then mine, then repeat previous steps.

Finally, she muscled him down, with help from me. She is smaller than me but he is so big that the sight of the two of us doing a takedown move on Charley was similar to the sight of a WWW wrestler being taken down by a toddler. We both were quite out matched. By the time he was down, I dare say, we were panting.

A few minutes to recover and she was ready to work. She got out her tool box of goodies. Needles and peanut butter. She gave me the container of peanut butter and told me it was frozen. I was told it was a diversion tactic. I was to let him lick on that while she stuck the pins in him. 

She said he would not feel the pins and besides, he would be too busy licking the peanut butter. All I could think of was hurry up and get those damn pins in because he is a fast eater lady! He began to lick and luck was not on my side. With the very first pin, he immediately reacted with a look backwards at her that said, that is about enough of that!  She told me I was to start talking to him like she was doing, soft and sorta non-stop chatter. So on we went, constantly talking in hushed tones to Charley who probably thought we were nuts. Heck, we were at that time except we weren’t eating the peanut butter.  

While repeatedly telling him something he has never heard so much in his lifetime, what a good boy he is, he was being inserted with pins down his spine, back legs and head. Only a few times did he budge and attempt to move. And yes, he did inhale the peanut butter abit too quickly even though it was frozen. I was supposed to make it harder to reach by flipping the paper lid down to block it somewhat.  

Determination is a powerful motivator.  My dog is determined and motivated to get peanut butter when it is within nose reach of his tongue. So that trick didn’t work so well.  His tongue is about the length of a hot dog so it was too easy to get around that silly lid.  He whipped that tongue around lickety split and lavishly licked up all that peanut butter left.

When she was done inserting the pins, we both sat there continuing to talk to him. She looked at me and says, very gently, this time we are going to bypass hooking him up to electrical stimulation. My mouth about dropped open! I wanted to say, ah, doc you will need to get the whole waiting room of people in here to hold him for that!  With Charley that just ain’t going to happen! 

She went on to tell me that I would notice he will slow down and eventually get very sleepy from the needles. It was important he not eat any, of the needles. (What, I thought to myself, how much will that cost if he swallows one!) And I also was not to allow him to shake! When he tried and she was in the room, she grabbed him quickly by the handle on his harness and said “No shaking Charley.” He looked very confused. Since when, he said back.

Now the real trauma occurred, she left the room. Yes, she left me in there by myself!  Read closely, I am in a tiny room with a 99 lb. dog that is not getting sedate, has pins down his back, head and legs and she tells me follow him, watch him closely and I will set the timer and be back shortly and was gone! I breathed deeply and stopped just long enough to see my dog begin to try to do one of those huge shakes…I ran over on my knees grabbing his neck to stop him and say no Charley!  And shazam, there went one needle out of his head, right down on the floor just missing my kneecap. 

Oh my, one down, how many more to go?  Charley did not bark for a long time. He did pace but remarkably went quite a while without barking. I had to continue to talk to him till I was practically hoarse to keep him under control. The only time I got away without talking is when he would decide my face needed cleaning or to give me loving and that big ole slobbery tongue did what it does best, nailed my face from one side to the other. And I had to allow it this time, every time. It beat having nails on my knees and him shake! 

Finally, unfortunately, the barking dog came back to life. And whoa, in full force. He decided he had enough and let loose, with a vengeance. I am not sure why she was so sure he would ever sleep because she had seen how lively he was in the office.  He never even laid down. But she was convinced acupuncture takes them to another place. I suppose it is kind-of like a happy place. Well Charley didn’t get there, not this time anyways. And come to think of it, neither did I!

He began head-cutting the sliding door she comes in, from the back of the office area. When she finally slid open the door to walk back in, what does my priced doggie do?  Took off through the door, needles and all! Yep, he slipped out and walked through to the back office area complete with all those needles sticking out of him. She was left having to go after him and retrieve him. Hell, I wasn’t going to help. Why would I, she left me in there all alone with that monster for all that time! 

She brought him back in somewhat reprimanding him for walking out. I could not help but laugh out loud.  I wanted to badly to say Good Boy Charley, you are smarter than the doctor! She turned around and he about tackled her. I think she learned not to lock your knees around Charley or they might buckle if he comes in at you full force.  She bent over I suppose to tell him it was okay he is big and clumsy and was given one of those yummy kisses I had to endure for what seemed like an hour in that bitty room.

I was given instructions to keep talking to him while she removed needles. Honestly, I had run out of things to say. How much conversation can I have with a dog in one day?  He was sick of me and I was sick of him!  When the needles were extracted, she was all smiles and said wow, didn’t they go well!  Now we can do it all over again next week!

Lord will I be ready?  What on earth am I going to be able to talk about next week with him?