Things a Mother Should Say to a Daughter

I had a very open relationship with my children and talked very frankly. Below are things I think should not go unsaid between a mother and a daughter. I covered this pretty well with mine. I hope you agree with my list!

Christina Lynn Glasmeier-Lewis

 

1. Your beauty inside is more important than the outside
2. Never let someone else define you
3. Always keep your eyes and ears open to God
4. Be diligent with your goals you have set for yourself if you are truly passionate about achieving them.  Worthwhile achievements seldom come easily.
5. Each child you bear will not come with a cookie cutter instruction book so do not expect to ace parenting. Do the best you can do and trust your instincts. God gave them to you, not somebody else.
6. Sex does not equate to love. Know the difference between a one night stand and a lover & friend that's committed for life.
7. Boys can be rude but girls can be flat out mean, at any age. Know it and expect it so you aren’t caught off guard. Don’t take it to heart. Just be selective with your inner circle of friends. Less is more.
8. Society will try to tell you what makes a woman. You need to decide that for yourself and not be held back by labels and everyone else’s expectations or you will always fall short or satisfy everyone but you.
9. It’s okay to cry. Tears are cathartic and can be healing, at any age.
10. Be forgiving of others. Grudges create hate in the heart. This will hurt you more.
11. Do not fear using your voice. It was given to you for a reason.
12. There is no such thing as too much education. Never stop learning new things.
13. Be happy in whatever you choice to do, in your choices. Being happy and positive is healthy.
14. Be self-accepting and have self-love. Without them, you can't truly reach your potential or love someone else unconditionally. 
15. I will always love you for you.

Look Up and Sing Happy Birthday

Happy Birthday to you,

We know you’re not blue,

We celebrate your birth day,

But we still grieve for you too.

2012 doesn’t seem that long ago, and then other times, it seems much too long. March 12^th, there was that call, the one no parent should get. Standing next to my husband seemed surreal as I could tell he was getting unfathomable news on the line. His son was deceased. 

The law and order of life seems to be you die first and then your children go. We both have talked a lot since Dan’s death about all the things each of us would have said to Dan. It’s funny because the one thing that would have not passed our lips is good-bye.

We strongly believe in Heaven, in a spiritual life after death.  And saying good-bye has a finality to it that is just hard to do with your own children.  It would have been far easier to have let him know, at least one more time, our feelings for him, individually. Naturally as a step-parent who came into the picture much later, mine were quite different than my husband’s.  But the chance is gone. Just like his life, the merry-go-round of life stopped turning. We had no notice, no inkling he would no longer be here.

I suppose everyone that knows someone and loves them deeply wishes they knew ahead of time they were going to die. Then you could have that final closure in advance. Without it, the hell of recovering is trying.  Letting go and moving on we have done but some days, like tomorrow, Dan’s birthday, are exceptionally difficult ones.

Since starting a Memorial Fund in his name, writing the check each birthday gives both of us, in particular Jim, a feeling we are gifting other young men life, Dan’s life from heaven. We both feel certain he is smiling and proud. He knows our love for him is being passed on to others.  It helps but it is also a knot in our stomachs because we can’t do anything anymore for him, for his children who lost a father.

Birthdays are celebrations of life. They are reminders of the life you are living and remembering to cherish the life you are given and not to take it for granted. Your birthday and those you love may not be here next year. We found that out the hard way. Take time to tell those you care about how you feel. Assuming may lead to singing Happy Birthday to the sky…..