Suicide is So Often Misunderstood

I read a post on a close friend's Facebook page recently that touched my heart. It was a short but powerful post she about suicide.

Many that follow my page know that I have lost a step-son through suicide. My friend has lost a dear brother in the same way. It is a much more complex issue than what those without the experience frequently think.

Dan Bronold

Society often quickly jumps to false conclusions. In our case, we read many posts on the media page that said Dan deserved to die, good riddance. there was no human compassion, no knowledge or interest in who he was, he had not even had a trial yet, he was guilty by public opinion.  

This post by friend made bears posting here, on my blog, to the many follower. I hope it will be shared and discussed. My hope is it will enlighten those unfamiliar with the topic, reinforce what those of us know and help spread some more information that might be helpful. IT is uncomfortable to discuss but needs to be out in the open and better understood by everyone. 

When I was younger, I had a session on this topic with a group of teens through my local church. Half way through the class, several teens broke down crying, including the tough males who never seemed bothered by a thing.  Most had experienced a loss of someone in this manner.  Wrapping your head around suicide is hard, at any age.  

I have made very few edits to my friend's words only to make it pertinent to the blog, more generic to everyone.

"Can't say it enough...Many people think that a suicide attempt is a selfish move because the person just does not care about the people left behind. I can tell you that when a person gets to that point, they truly believe that their loved ones will be much better off with them gone.This is mental illness not selfishness. 

TRUTH: Depression is a terrible disease and seems relentless. A lot of us have been close to that edge, or dealt with family members in a crisis, and some have lost friends and loved ones. Let's look out for each other and stop sweeping mental illness under the rug. May I ask my family and friends wherever you might be, to kindly pass this information on and give it a moment of support to all those who have family problems, health struggles, job issues, worries of any kind and just need to know that someone cares.

Do it for all of us, for nobody is immune. 

Hope to see this on the walls of Facebook, Social Media locations everywhere, all my family and friends just for moral support for myself and so many others I don't know names of, faces, circumstances. I know some will!!! I did it for a friend and you can too. No personal information needs to be shared. Thank you."

Special thank you to my dear friend for posting this on their page,as a reminder to all of the loss we suffered that is with us forever. When she shared her story, I never dreamed in just a year or so, I would be in a similar

situation but only mine would be my husband's only child, my step-son.  The scars remain and society's reaction is not what you would expect. We must be compassionate and better comprehend what is behind this. Only then can be begin to prevent it also.  Mental illness and health is not a nasty topic or a sign of weakness. 

My husband and I  started a fund at a camp for troubled youths to help prevent teens from continuing down a self-destructive path after our son's death. This Camp is Christian-based and is focused on preventing attendees from meeting a similar fate, helping them get on a path where they can reach adulthood and then not destroy their adult lives. If you choose to research it or donate it, it is listed below.  There are just too many successful stories of lives impacted to even know where to begin. 

May your eyes be open and you open someone else's eyes to the beauty of life and the outreach for those needing help! 

Midcourse Correction Challenge Camp

Attn: Dan Bronold Memorial Fund

833 E. Grand River Ave

Howell, MI 48843

For more info on Midcourse C. Camp, Click Here

Teens at Risk; Challenge Camp

When teens are in distress it is often due to anger issues. These can be a result of so many things, anything due to stress from home, problems

in school with bullying, pressure from peers, and self-esteem conflicts.  So many see no way out so resort to inappropriate coping skills.  We often see and meet many adults that do this as well. The jails are full of them as are the work place. Parents on the sidelines are screaming at their kids, being nasty to the referees, and bosses believing that cutting down their employees to size are the way to lead.

The value system established at a young age is instrumental in shaping a young person’s life. Getting them started on a path of not only self-discovery but goal setting and action steps is so very important with today’s youth.  To teach a teen how  to overcome the haphazard and hurdles they are sure to face in this world is to build a better tomorrow for all of us. It may lead to happiness, success and the lack of total despair so many face.

Thus, many have heard my husband and I talk about Midcourse Correction Challenge Camp in Michigan.  We established a fund there in honor of my step-son, my husband and his ex-wife’s Kay’s only son, Dan Bronold.  This is to give Dan’s life a legacy of helping others accomplish what he could not, a chance of breaking free from a stereo-type of trouble-maker.  He had what so many suffer from in our youth in society, the lack of thinking he could be someone bigger than who he was and never really believing in himself. The potential was always there if he had only had found the faith. This Camp does that to so many and it helps parents reach their kids in a different kind of way.

We wanted to reach out to let folks know that support this camp the mailing address for donations has changed. So whether you give in support of Dan’s fund or just give to reach youth at risk, please pass this changed address on.

Midcourse Correction Challenge Camp

Attn:  Dan Bronold Memorial Fund

833 E. Grand River Ave.

Howell, MI  48843

Gratitude Letter to Dan

When you give, you shall receive. When you lose something, give something back to see it multiple.

I have always believed this to be true but thought heart ache and pain sometimes struggle believing it. Today, amidst the tears streaming down my face, am reminded just how true this is.

My blog shall be simple and to the point.  I am not in much of a position to write more.

Many know that after my step-son, my husband Jim’s only son, Dan 

Bronold died we set up a memorial scholarship in his name, The Daniel 

Bronold Memorial Scholarship Fund. This money was donated to an organization to help offset costs needed for young men to attend Midcourse Correction Challenge Camp in Brighton, Michigan. So many your teens are turned away each year because they can’t afford the fees.  The fee is set at a minimal amount to cover simply the costs as this organization is a nonprofit. Many of  the employees were past graduates of the program who have gone on with their lives, gotten degrees and returned later on in life to work there.

This is a no nonsense camp full of a weekend of tough love, team building, and goal setting.  For many troubled teens, this is the last stop to try to get them on the right path. Most are on a collision course with self-destruction and many don’t care or know how to turn it around.  Sometimes the parents don’t either and need the help also.

The program is Christian based, which is something we liked and knew Dan would approve of also.  We wanted to pick something we felt Dan would be proud of and enjoy having his name associated with and this seemed perfect.  This fund would give some guys a chance before it was too late that might not  be able to attend otherwise.    And since the years of Dan’s death, the Executive Director, Richard Woods, lets us know each year the donors, amounts and the number of folks that benefit from the funding.  We are privileged to hear some of the stories without giving enough information to breach anyone’s privacy.  He also shares Dan’s story as an example of why it is best to turn your life around before it is too late.

Today, we were blessed beyond belief. A single mother asked for our name and wanted to write us directly.  I don’t feel comfortable sharing her letter as it was intimate.  It was forwarded to use through the Executive Director as he  is not giving out our contact information to anyone either but the essence of the letter was to thank us.  She wanted to let us know that without our money her son wouldn’t have attended camp. With his attendance, his life has completely changed.  Their relationship has turned in ways she never thought possible.  She feels like God has touched him in a very special place and turned the light on in her son.  They have reached a new level of understanding, her joy and gratefulness is so heartful in the letter.  She wants us to know that her and her son will never forget Dan and the Fund and us.  Her letter shows us that Dan is touching lives in a way that we can both indeed can be proud of.

There have been times, over the months and years, we have been disappointed that we can’t raise more money that we are many times, and the only one donating to the Memorial we set up. But we remind ourselves, if all we do is save one teen, if it was just one Dan that would be enough!  If one parent is spared the pain, if one person is not dying as Dan did, that is enough so our donation, several times a year will suffice.  We want to be sure we are doing what we can also to spare a parent from the pain of being on the receiving end of a phone call, from wondering if they did all they could and of not having any holidays left to celebrate with their child ever again. 

This letter confirmed our conviction that the Memorial Fund was the way to ensure we are making a difference in people’s lives, in children’s and in parents. Dan’s name is helping kids turn their lives around and get a new lease on life.  It was and is the just and right thing to do. As long as there is a memorial fund in his name, Dan Bronold’s legacy lives on!  And as the mother said in the close of her letter, her and her son will forever be grateful to Dan, dead or alive to them, he is always alive!

God bless you Dan always in heaven for what your spirit is doing!   Love always!  

If you would like to learn more about Midcourse Correction Challenge Camp, visit http://www.midcoursecorrection.org/

To donate to the fund, Send donations to:

Midcourse Correction Challenge Camp

Attn:  Dan Bronold Memorial Fund

833 E Grand River Ave

Howell, MI 48843