Gratitude Letter to Dan

When you give, you shall receive. When you lose something, give something back to see it multiple.

I have always believed this to be true but thought heart ache and pain sometimes struggle believing it. Today, amidst the tears streaming down my face, am reminded just how true this is.

My blog shall be simple and to the point.  I am not in much of a position to write more.

Many know that after my step-son, my husband Jim’s only son, Dan 

Bronold died we set up a memorial scholarship in his name, The Daniel 

Bronold Memorial Scholarship Fund. This money was donated to an organization to help offset costs needed for young men to attend Midcourse Correction Challenge Camp in Brighton, Michigan. So many your teens are turned away each year because they can’t afford the fees.  The fee is set at a minimal amount to cover simply the costs as this organization is a nonprofit. Many of  the employees were past graduates of the program who have gone on with their lives, gotten degrees and returned later on in life to work there.

This is a no nonsense camp full of a weekend of tough love, team building, and goal setting.  For many troubled teens, this is the last stop to try to get them on the right path. Most are on a collision course with self-destruction and many don’t care or know how to turn it around.  Sometimes the parents don’t either and need the help also.

The program is Christian based, which is something we liked and knew Dan would approve of also.  We wanted to pick something we felt Dan would be proud of and enjoy having his name associated with and this seemed perfect.  This fund would give some guys a chance before it was too late that might not  be able to attend otherwise.    And since the years of Dan’s death, the Executive Director, Richard Woods, lets us know each year the donors, amounts and the number of folks that benefit from the funding.  We are privileged to hear some of the stories without giving enough information to breach anyone’s privacy.  He also shares Dan’s story as an example of why it is best to turn your life around before it is too late.

Today, we were blessed beyond belief. A single mother asked for our name and wanted to write us directly.  I don’t feel comfortable sharing her letter as it was intimate.  It was forwarded to use through the Executive Director as he  is not giving out our contact information to anyone either but the essence of the letter was to thank us.  She wanted to let us know that without our money her son wouldn’t have attended camp. With his attendance, his life has completely changed.  Their relationship has turned in ways she never thought possible.  She feels like God has touched him in a very special place and turned the light on in her son.  They have reached a new level of understanding, her joy and gratefulness is so heartful in the letter.  She wants us to know that her and her son will never forget Dan and the Fund and us.  Her letter shows us that Dan is touching lives in a way that we can both indeed can be proud of.

There have been times, over the months and years, we have been disappointed that we can’t raise more money that we are many times, and the only one donating to the Memorial we set up. But we remind ourselves, if all we do is save one teen, if it was just one Dan that would be enough!  If one parent is spared the pain, if one person is not dying as Dan did, that is enough so our donation, several times a year will suffice.  We want to be sure we are doing what we can also to spare a parent from the pain of being on the receiving end of a phone call, from wondering if they did all they could and of not having any holidays left to celebrate with their child ever again. 

This letter confirmed our conviction that the Memorial Fund was the way to ensure we are making a difference in people’s lives, in children’s and in parents. Dan’s name is helping kids turn their lives around and get a new lease on life.  It was and is the just and right thing to do. As long as there is a memorial fund in his name, Dan Bronold’s legacy lives on!  And as the mother said in the close of her letter, her and her son will forever be grateful to Dan, dead or alive to them, he is always alive!

God bless you Dan always in heaven for what your spirit is doing!   Love always!  

If you would like to learn more about Midcourse Correction Challenge Camp, visit http://www.midcoursecorrection.org/

To donate to the fund, Send donations to:

Midcourse Correction Challenge Camp

Attn:  Dan Bronold Memorial Fund

833 E Grand River Ave

Howell, MI 48843

Dan Bronold Memorial Fund

Happy Birthday Son!

Looking Back…

                                   

New parents look down at the face of a newborn child and wish that their child will grow up happy, healthy and successful.   Such was the case for a couple in 1978 when they adopted a baby boy.  Daniel James Bronold was brought home from the hospital and began his life like so many children in America.  Two parents loved him and provided a good home with Christian values. Dan’s childhood went by fairly unscathed with fun times swimming, fishing, snowmobiling and a love of basketball.  

But when Dan became a teen things changed dramatically.  His efforts in school diminished and his respect for authority went downhill. By high school, he was skipping school frequently, smoking pot, hanging with a crowd of friends that were in to living in the moment like him.  His friends of the past were gone.  His anger towards authority, rules and regulations were playing havoc in the household and in his life.  His parents saw the signs of a life spiraling downhill and tried all paths to get him back on track but each avenue was met with outright defiance.  

Dan dropped out of school, and developed a lifetime habit of self-destruction.  He had brief periods where he would try to turn things around.  The moments of clarity, there would be amends made, and signs of hope but they were brief.  And then, he would drop back into his pattern even further and angrier than the time before, more depressed and more dysfunctional. 

As Dan’s step mother, it was plain for me to see, early on, that Dan’s father was a silent supporter of his son.  Countless times during calls and sporadic visits, he reiterated to his son that he had the power to change if he made the choice.  The pattern Dan developed was using his dad for the staple Dan was always in short supply of, money. The last few years of his life, Dan’s only calls to his dad were 911 calls “Dad, help me, I need money for bail, for rent, for drugs, for food, etc.” 

Gone were the meaningful dialogues between father and son. In its place now was deception, lies and a hunger to feed a lifestyle that was totally out of control.  When he couldn't manipulate his dad, he then tried working him through me. Dan had a sweet heart but he didn't let it guide his choices.   Inside, he needed help, and yet refused to go get it. His father loved him enough to step aside and not be part of the problem by only giving him money. His dad wanted to only give money to Dan if it was used as part of the solution, e.g. counseling, education. Their love was mutual, but the communication was gone.  Only Dan had the power to change and we prayed it would happen.

The waiting was over on March 19^th, 2012; a change had come. The news that flashed on the local TV network simply showed a mug shot of a Hispanic young man, dead at 33 years old.  Dan Bronold was awaiting trial for tentative charges, hung himself in a jail cell after being in solitary confinement since early December 2011 and an investigation was underway to figure out how this happened in the Ingham County Jail.  Daniel James Bronold, he is gone from this earth but never ever forgotten. He lives in the life of those that love him and those he touched forever.

Moving On…

A special memorial is being started by Dan’s father to help young teens find their way out of this downward spiral before it is too late.  This situation with Dan and his parents is happening all over this country.  Young teens lose their live; parents lose control of their kids and run out of options.  This continues into adulthood, our prisons are full of such stories.  A decision was made on the anniversary of Dan’s death to commit to a special memorial fund and to ask others to consider it as well.  So much work needs to be done in this area and Dan’s story can give others the chance.  We feel Dan would want this, and would be proud to lend his name to the efforts for change.   

Thus, a tremendous amount of research went into finding just the right program within Michigan in remembrance of Dan.  We knew Michigan has a high incidence of issues in this area and as a state; they are hurting terribly for funding. We wanted to help a program that needed help, where our donation dollars would make a difference and be noticed.  

Midcourse Correction Challenge Camps stood out easily as the choice. It was started over 20 years ago for at-risk teens, ages 11-17. This is exactly the age where Dan began his descent and this is the critical time to get things turned around.  It has a military structure, so that the teens are able to learn self-control. The military aspect makes it highly structured and supervised, but also it’s positive, and unlike other camps, does not tear teens down.  

We quickly learned that this is not a camp that just barks orders. They teach teens to take responsibility for their actions, while learning tools for life.  They do a series of hands-on, group based activities that teach goal setting, trust, communication, doing hard things, depending on, and working with others, and how to respect themselves, and authority. The teens are shown where they are heading based on the choices that they are making. The teens will gain new levels of self-esteem as well as respect for others.  The program is tough, physically, but also mentally.  It really gets the teens to examine their choices and behavior, and where it will get them.  Too many teens lack motivation, make up rules as they go, and live in the moment.  Midcourse is designed to wake these teens up, and get them on the right path, and prevent as many of these Dan stories as they can.  Most of the teens that attend camp are forever changed.

Midcourse also provides outreach to the teens after they leave camp.  There is follow up with the teens to see how they are doing.  If they aren’t doing well, they will make house calls to the teen’s home, or have phone conversations with the teen to try and get them back on track.  They also have a mentoring program called Honor Company where the teens can come back and learn about things like; integrity, charity, relationships, and self-control.  They are very steadfast when it comes to not giving up on teens.  They also provide parenting classes to help bring some peace and stability into these homes; this program truly cares about results and the teens it mentors.   

We spoke to the director of Midcourse, Rich Wood, several times as well as a staff member. We found that Midcourse separates itself from so many other programs.  Rich has a strong Christian influence that helps him guide this mission.  Rich and the staff have a passion and conviction to make a difference in the lives of young people.  It was apparent that Midcourse runs on limited funds.  Any amount we can give or can draw to their program is needed and will be used to help a teen have a chance to better their live.  

Each year Midcourse has to turn away hundreds of kids, because their parents cannot afford the $425 to send them for the weekend camp.  If even one of these teens end up like Dan, that is one too many.  This will be an annual donation on Dan’s birthday, August 12th.  Please consider if this is a worthwhile contribution for you.  The youth of today are the true future of tomorrow, these teens, if not turned around are not going to be the good guys in society.

Most boot camps are unforgiving in nature. Most boot camps are extremely expensive.  This one is neither. Counseling is expensive and many teens won’t go.  This option does not involve either.  Counseling did not help Dan or save him from dying.  Dan never went to a camp like this. Getting teens out of their element and peer group and to this Camp can be critical.  Maybe a camp like this would have saved Dan; we will never know.  Giving a tax free donation in any amount to this program is a way to find out.   It is helping a parent that can’t afford to send a child to camp but needs to or a teen that is willing to go but can’t afford to.  Are you willing to throw money in the pot to make someone’s community safer?  

At-risk teens need to know that they can change. This needs to happen before they throw their lives away. This program brings about positive results. Maybe all kids can’t be saved, but maybe your dollar will be the one that saves a lost soul like Dan before the phone rings and brings news that he is not coming home again…ever.

Click for Video

Donations can be sent to:

Midcourse Correction

Attn: Dan Bronold Memorial Fund          

833 E Grand River Ave
Howell, MI 48843          * Note:  The opening page of the video should state the name of the                                                               camp as Midcourse Correction Challenge Camp.                                  

Make checks payable to :Midcourse Correction.

Put: Dan Bronold Memorial Fund in Memo  section of check or on note w/check (or can call directly to put on credit card for donating for this fund)              

Midcourse is a non-profit organization; your donations are tax deductible.
You will receive a receipt from MCC.  
Please contact them directly 810-227-0243 for CC Payments.