I kind of doubt people, like cats, get nine lives but I am
not so sure we don’t get another go around. I have friends that believe that they
have been here before. Some swear that they
Let’s be clear about one thing, in general I am not shy. Having
studied communications, public speaking has been a big part of my career path.
However, God failed to give me the gene of innate singing ability. I have an
amazing ear for music, and detect perfect tone, and an appreciation for all
genres of music. But the one thing I am lacking is the one passion I so want,
the ability to open my mouth and sound like a songbird. Dear God, I know I have
the “It” factor and would definitely have that showmanship and touch millions
of people’s hearts if only I had the voice I was destined to have. When you
created me with the need to turn off the mic when I start to sing, you missed
the mark.
Have you noticed all the beautiful feet on the women you
made? I know vanity isn’t something you
placed a high prize on after Eve’s antics but with the advent of the sandal for
high fashion for women, it wasn’t long before pedicures followed. Shortly
thereafter began men’s foot fetish. How come I was left out here and given boat
feet? A size 11 foot for a woman would
require a two appointment booking for a pedicure, twice the cost and no matter
how good a job was done, it is too much to take in for any man in ‘’just one
look’’. When a man’s mind is on a boat,
it is not thinking of a sexy looking woman.
My feet have been bigger than all of my husbands for Father’s sake.
(See, I know not to use your name in vain!)
I raised my children as a single mother. I suppose that
means I did a lousy job in picking some husbands. Lessons learned can be invaluable though I
can't blame you for poor choices in that category fairly. You created tons of options! My father
wasn’t good at mate-picking either on the first-go-round either. He got divorced too. He raised my sister and me for a while as a
single father. In a few years, he remarried.
Shame though that his new wife hated my sister and I. Could you have made
us not a constant reminder of our biological mother? Or maybe, God could you
have made her love us both a bit more? Next time, give it a more thought. Being a kid feeling hated many times was not exactly a whole heck of a lot of
fun. It was so apparent we were the step-kids like the ugly misfits growing up. There were some good moments in
there but overall feeling as an outsider in your own home was kind of like living in
the SPCA waiting to get adopted by a loving family that wasn’t going to hold
your genes against you. I wasn't crazy about the clothes from Sears mail catalog, I look back and think I looked geeky. Or maybe I was a nerd?
This experience though, gave me some insight so that part
was good. I developed into a compassionate woman but I have to be honest with
you, lighten up on the sensitivity measure please. It sometimes makes me feel you subjected me
to feeling perhaps a little screwed up for life, more so than the rest of the
folks I hang out with. But maybe that is why I am so funny. Don’t you think I
am funny God? Bet you laugh your ass off when I get to heaven God! Oh and extra
thank you for not putting “It is sinful to use the words ass or shit in the Ten
Commandments.”
My children never knew and still don’t know their
grandmother, my real mom that is. We didn’t rekindle any kind of relationship
till I turned 50 and about then my daughter disengaged from me. Maybe the right
word is dumped me. She essentially decided all of my support for her all of her
life was done so she no longer needed me anymore so why keep me involved. I
think she wanted a friend and not a mom but thank you for not making me that. I
am not so sure she’d have gotten to where she is if I’d have been a BFF. I know she wouldn’t have if I did what my
mother did to me, high tailed it out of town with a guy I met in a bar and flip
flopped from one to another, living on love, or is that lust? Her
letter to you would suggest you find her a new Mom and maybe I can relate
because at times, I wish my mom had been made different too, like one who
stayed around like I did!
The irony God, you know, is all those years I was there for
my kids making so many sacrifices unlike my biological mother. Close to the
same time my daughter dumped me, I really began to notice things changing with
my son. He got so busy in his own life
that he didn’t have much time to really be a son anymore. You made me into a
burden to him, something that is often forgotten, something that gets replaced
with friends, vacations, parties, etc.… Can you make me more fun and worthwhile
to my son next go round so I can have enough attention that my ego isn’t
bruised? At 58 I’d prefer to get the
attention my friends get from their kids. Thanks though for the forewarning,
make friends with my friends’ kids and ask to be adopted or the nursing home is
going to be a lonely place with no visitors. As I tell my mother, you left your
kids and I stayed with mine and you get to get real old and die with a relationship with yours. I don't get that with my daughter loving me unconditionally and a son that won't come see me like I come to see her. So maybe leaving me wasn't the worst thing she could have done afterall and she should really stop apologizing now. I am where she was all those years ago. God, you really screwed that up, sorry to
say , from my perspective and my mom's. Rework the plan next time or make me a total bitch so shit doesn’t hurt!
Cancer was a shocker in my life. I think I'd have liked to keep my breast. But I do believe that it has helped me stay motivated to work for this crummy disease that takes so many beautiful people, and not so kind people. But a life is a life, they are all worth trying to save. And you know how much work I have done trying to save them. Can you help me make even more of an impact next go round? I have a few friends that died too young. I would switch places with them so they could have hung around longer with their kids. They had kids that so loved them and just bawled like their entire world ended when their mom died. I think I would have rather switched places with them and not see their kids die abit inside. I know, your plan is the plan. And their death and their kids keeps me fighting and I have made an impact, but geez, is there another way to teach lessons than having women have to cut off body parts? Pardon the pun but it feels like a booby trap that just ain't funny God.
And in the pet’s category, what were you thinking? Yes, God finds homes for all his beloved
animals that need one. But why couldn’t I have a good one, a calm one, not ones
that should be on Prozac. My last two dogs are ones that act like they came
from the shelter and were abused instead of coming from a breeder as puppies to
a loving home, mine! What could be more
loving and stable than me? Nada more
perfect place! Now I have a puppy that eats body parts off of stuffed animals
like the last dog. Isn’t that much like
animals in the wild? Can I have a pussy
of a dog next time please?
I want to be rich. I don’t give a damn about being famous. I
want to travel around the world, see different cultures and see all the cool
stuff you created. I am not satisfied just meeting the kooks you created here
in the United States. I want to meet the weird ones elsewhere! I want to give to the tons of worthwhile
organizations out there that no one bothers with that do so many good deeds and
go so unnoticed and unfunded. I want to do the work that, if Jesus had been
funded, he would have done. Yep, I want money so you can whisper in my ear when
I prayer, put the dough here, let the bread multiply here so at the end of the
day, I can still feel rich but for the right reasons. I can then hop on a plane
and know someone else is super excited and thrilled too. That is the stuff that
lights my fire!
Can I be surrounded by sincerity and leaders that care about
humanity and the compassion of all of your people or is that asking way too
much? Maybe I pushed the limits on that
one since you give freewill. If so, I will back off. I just hate seeing the
folks that have the power use it only to enrich themselves and their buddies
that are rich and powerful and let others suffer. I know this disappoints you
too, people following false leaders with not very good intentions. Also, it
sure would be an added plus if friends and people treated each other kindly and
with respect for who they are. Why is accepting differences and diversity you
created so hard for some people? Do they not see their differences?
God, all in all, you have done a damn good job with my life.
Your plan, as its unfolded sure has had a lot of ups and downs, and lots of
pylons, my word for hurdles. I know I have banged into a few. Sometimes my
driving needs some help, I am directionally challenged! But when I look back at the journey, every
path you took me on led me to a destination that made me smarter than when I
took off.
When I look at myself, I am far richer for having gone on
this path, the least traveled path and by far, physically and in my own quirky
way, less perfect. So maybe I need to reconsider, should I ask for a redo at
all? Aye, maybe I will leave that call
up to you after all. Your master plan is
what it is. I rest easier knowing you are in charge instead of me. If I was,
hell, who knows where I would land up, probably in heaven a lot quicker
actually! And you might not be ready for
me yet!
