His mother, I presumed, had her arm over his shoulder was
lightly rubbing his shoulders with her hands and occasionally bending over
whispering something in his ears. As I
glanced over and caught her eye, we exchanged smiles. Once I got my drink, I went over and asked
her about the headphones as they looked quite different to me, larger than
normal I thought. It was then she told me that they were a special pair, to
reduce sound because her son is autistic and has issues with auditory
stimulation. Too much noise over stimulates him so they put those on when in
public to cut the noise level down to decrease the incidence of outbursts.
I told her I had young grandchildren that were autistic and
found them to be extremely loving children. She began to tell me the story of
her son. He was her second child. She
had been a kindergarten teacher when he was born four years after his
brother. He seemed to be behind early on but she
assumed he would catch on and catch up eventually. Once he started in school,
he was considered more of a problem child as he was given to fits and being
somewhat violent out of frustration and diagnosed with autism at that point. He
was removed from public schools as she quickly learned they were not the best
equipped, in her opinion, to deal with her son’s needs. She quit her job and devoted much of her
time to getting him into special therapy and classes for autistic
children.
He is now 22 years old, operates at about the age of a three
year old and is the one of the biggest joys of their family’s lives. He is extremely affectionate and asks for
nothing in return. He speaks but is
limited in his vocabulary. The most
important thing to a mother and father he can say though, communicate his basic
needs.
He has his odd idiosyncrasies but that is what helps make him special and unique. For example, he enjoys picking up trash so while we were talking, off he went in a circle picking up some trash some loiters had left on the carpet around us. His mother watched him all the while with a smile on her face and said she has learned to find his little tasks like this endearing. There is no use in telling him that the cleanup crews will clean up the pieces of paper he is picking off the carpet. He derives so much happiness in doing so that to interrupt him would only cause him anxiety and sadness. If they don’t watch him at home, he enjoys talking all of the toilet paper off of the rolls and the paper towel rolls as well! These types of things are part of the humor and joy of living with autism.
He has his odd idiosyncrasies but that is what helps make him special and unique. For example, he enjoys picking up trash so while we were talking, off he went in a circle picking up some trash some loiters had left on the carpet around us. His mother watched him all the while with a smile on her face and said she has learned to find his little tasks like this endearing. There is no use in telling him that the cleanup crews will clean up the pieces of paper he is picking off the carpet. He derives so much happiness in doing so that to interrupt him would only cause him anxiety and sadness. If they don’t watch him at home, he enjoys talking all of the toilet paper off of the rolls and the paper towel rolls as well! These types of things are part of the humor and joy of living with autism.
He cannot tie his shoes but he can wave at people when they
address him, and at times, he does. His mother said she was not sure how he
would react to me but I could try to say hello to him. He
kept looking my way and smiling so I slowly looked at him and made eye contact
a few times. Then I knelt down being careful not to get too close and lightly
put my hand on his back right by his mother’s hand, smiled and said hello. He stared down at the floor, smiled real big
and said hello back. For an autistic
person, this is wonderful, this is a welcome, and I was so pleased he accepted
me. I told him it was a pleasure to meet him and meant it! That exchange meant my day, he was just a sweet young man.
His mother’s story did not end with her son. This Thanksgiving season has more in store
for her family. As she sat there on that bench, so peaceful and full of joy,
beneath the surface, she is praying reverently for a miracle.
I hope those of you reading this will too. You see, as she sat there, hanging on to her son closely, as if the two of them were the only two people in the world, her world could get quite a bit smaller indeed.
I hope those of you reading this will too. You see, as she sat there, hanging on to her son closely, as if the two of them were the only two people in the world, her world could get quite a bit smaller indeed.
Her husband and her only other son, 26 years old has both
been diagnosed with Stage 4 colon cancer. She went on to elaborate and tell me
the prognosis is not good and everyone at the church is praying for some sort
of miracle. She knows in her heart they will be healed. However, she is not sure it will be done on
earth, as it is looking more likely it will be healing in heaven. She is accepting God’s plan with the grace
she accepted her autistic son twenty two years ago. They were only at the mall today because both
men were having a good day and wanted to get out. She sat there telling me that she was so
grateful that she had her son because one day he may be all she has and she
would need him as much as he needs her.
I told her I would share her story. Thus, I am.
I believe her faith is beautiful
and shows the light of God. I believe
that is partially why her son’s smile is so bright. I told her of my young grandsons and she
offered words of wisdom. I hope you,
that are reading this, will find the time to reach out to this stranger in
prayer.
There is no way I could hear this story and not reflect on
my two grandsons, Ty and Jake. Her son
was so good looking and really looked like any other twenty two year old. For
some reason, I sensed he was autistic but yet there was nothing about him to
clue me into it directly. The woman told me that once you have been around
autism you seem to have a keener sense of those that possibly have it than
others do. I believe I met her for a
reason. She was truly inspirational and
she loved hearing about our family’s Jake and Ty.
I also believe, if you think of this woman’s story this
Thanksgiving, you will realize you too have a lot to be thankful for and to be
smiling about. The image of her, the loving mother, on that bench with her devoted innocent son
sitting next to her wanting nothing but his mother’s unconditional love was
precious. In a world full of unsatisfied
wants and needs that seem to be endless, it is refreshing to see quiet acceptance
and embracing of what some see as a difficult situation. Who would imagine themselves in this situation and sitting anywhere happy and at peace?
May we stop for a moment in our tracks and
reflect on what we truly do have. May we rejoice in those gifts. And last, but certainly not least, bless you
for what you bring to God’s kingdom, your uniqueness and the light you
shine. May it continue to shine on earth
till our true King calls you home.
Updated video on Ty Ryan & Jake James Glasmeier Below :
