A new day is dawning. It is more about my attitude I think
than the sunrise.
Too many folks use friendships as dumping grounds for
problems in their life, be it personal or professional. Honestly, not everyone
wants to hear your trash, partially because we all have our own stuff, our own
stress we are dealing with.
It does not mean that the world lacks compassion, people
care, people that are close. Most want
to know what you are going thru. I believe people want to help but using others
as a crutch, forming co-dependent relationships is detrimental. Most people are
not trained in psychology at the Masters or Doctorial level and asking them for
help or sounding off on them is risking getting bad advice or working yourself
into a frenzy. Too often people simply restate their problems over and over
again. This accomplishes nothing but
obsessing over what isn’t right instead of fixing what is wrong.
I think I wasted time in my life doing just this. Talking to
myself and even to others about me about what I thought was wrong with me, my
life and even my experiences in the past.
I believe I wasted my time and those I confided in. What’s more, I left
a lot out, for various reasons. Some memories I never even had total recall for
a long time.
Going to a professional
over an extended period of time has allowed me to speak to an outsider, someone who forced me to listen to myself speak. We all
need someone with no feelings towards us to mirror our words. We benefit when
someone makes us make decisions that force us to change and not repeat errors
and accept some responsibility for our own happiness and our future.
With the right therapist, you can move on, get to a point,
where you truly get in
