These past few weeks, it has been difficult to get my head around writing a blog. I keep waiting for that divine intervention of an idea, that perfect topic to come up to expand on, one that touches my heart and soul. The only thought to write about that keeps reoccurring is one that sort of leaves me emotionally feeling paralyzed. That immobilization scares me. It also makes it indeed a challenge to convey my thoughts in writing.
I have reflecting, these past few weeks, on the plight of several close friends paths in life. I have been haunted by a few unfortunate turn of events. A few friends have had things in life happen where it is as if they took an unexpected drop off of a cliff and managed to hang on a thin ledge. They cling there, bewildered, yet full of faith. All the while, they are questioning, where were the friends that said they would forewarn them before they got that close to the edge? And I wonder to myself also, where were they? Does true honesty in most friendships not exist? Are people unwilling to share feedback if it is unfavorable? Why do others not extend more help or ideas to do what they can to help friends succeed? Do friends not feel, in any way, vested in their friends success? I think we all know the answer to this. Safely guard and nurture the friends that do!!!
During this same time frame, a few other friends have had wonderful news occurring in their life. They indeed have been blessed and are celebrating their good fortune, as they should. I am overjoyed for them, yet saddened that life could not have met somewhere in the middle so that both friends could have had a moment of satisfaction. But life doesn't work that way. It is God’s plan, not ours. And we all must face our dark moments to get to and appreciate the light.
As I have silently and pensively reflected on this paradox at home, my mood has been somber. My dog Charley can sense this easily. He feels my pain, always has. And he feels certain the best way to help me overcome my sadness and confusion is to focus my attention on him. That can simply be best done by petting him. To accomplish this feat, he bothers me relentlessly by doing whatever must be done to get me to pet him. This must be quite hard on him because it entails doing actions he has long since given up, head butting me on the legs, trying to jump on my lap when I am sitting, barking at me, laying his head on my lap, etc. He is particularly fond of making a U turn so that his rear-end is facing me so I can scratch his backside as if to say “Yes, life can be pretty smelly but you still have me.”
I know that things will turn around for my friends that are struggling right now and that life will make a U turn for them in the days ahead. And those that are rejoicing, they had their moments of despair and have been justly rewarded for their struggles. My friendship will always be steadfast for all of my dear friends. And the friends that should matter to all of them, no matter where they reside in the journey of life, will be devout. As one friend said recently, “It is when things aren't going well; you look around and realize who your true friends are.” So true.
We are not in this world alone for a reason, it is definitely by design. We need to help each other, or as Charley implies, pet each other. So maybe my darn dog is reinforcing something critically important to me. I am not so helpless after all in any of friends’ plights of life’s letdowns. I am doing something. Just being a reinforcement as a friend, an unconditional supporter, can make a huge difference. You don’t need to put your rear in someone’s face to create a positive change, like Charley, but you can certainly nudge them and let them know you are there.
I apologize but I must sign off now. Someone is weaving in and out of my legs, at the moment, all 105 lbs. of him. He is letting his presence be known, much like that friend that knows you and is assured that you will always take their call when they are in need. Well, this friend, though aggravating at times, and most assuredly getting dog hair on my pants, is taking precedence over anything at the moment. And that, as I hope my blog has clearly stated, is what good friendships are about. Figure out who yours are and give them prominence in your life, support them in all ways! Charley is one of mine.............